<?xml version='1.0' encoding='UTF-8'?><?xml-stylesheet href="http://www.blogger.com/styles/atom.css" type="text/css"?><feed xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom' xmlns:openSearch='http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/' xmlns:georss='http://www.georss.org/georss'><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440</id><updated>2009-10-01T19:44:27.016+08:00</updated><title type='text'>Chua's cubbyhole (growing stronger every day! :D)</title><subtitle type='html'></subtitle><link rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#feed' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/'/><link rel='hub' href='http://pubsubhubbub.appspot.com/'/><link rel='next' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default?start-index=26&amp;max-results=25'/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email></author><generator version='7.00' uri='http://www.blogger.com'>Blogger</generator><openSearch:totalResults>101</openSearch:totalResults><openSearch:startIndex>1</openSearch:startIndex><openSearch:itemsPerPage>25</openSearch:itemsPerPage><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-269518950007784450</id><published>2009-08-13T13:05:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-08-13T13:33:54.412+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Omigoodness... the past 6 days or so were like being stuck in some twilight zone. I'm glad for the moment that I've finally FINALLY posted out the last application for companies whose deadlines are about now (8/14~17.... 3!!!!). While working on the stuff to submit my mind would sorta wander sometimes, thinking what would happen if I was called for interviews and what would happen if I got hired and stuff... My mind's still completely blank as to what I would want to say during interviews.. I definitely know that I'd have something to say regardless or what they ask but it feels like my thoughts won't come out coherently or not even come out at all.. I guess that means I will have to start trying to speak proper Japanese again and phased out all the slangs and all.. which isn't as easy as doing the same to English. Heh. But anyway, I was thinking, even though it's really annoying to rush to post out my applications like this, I think I'd be pretty okay with not being able to get a job this time round. I mean.. I seriously don't think I'm up to standard yet. And if a company is willing to take a leap of faith in me I'd be very very thankful, but if not, well, I would say I'd expected it. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;But its not to say I'd be disappointed.. maybe just 30~50% yea maybe.. but I think I'd be happy to really take the extra time (be it the extra 6 months extension period to remain in Japan and look for a job after my student visa expires or the 4 years I'd spend in NUS after going home) to ground my foundation in drawing, and to really experiment and get my hands dirty with all sorts of drawing styles.. ther different styles of the different anime studios.. not just the lines pertaining to objects but the expression of shadows and highlights, maybe movement and timing as well... though I'd say it doesn't really interest me at this moment (cos its so.... HARD). If it was meant to be I'd come back and look for a job again, shouldn't be such a big thing (though it is.. haha).&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, another thing that crossed my mind was about living out a life drawing vs living out a life on the textbook side (Ha.. what I call it). Now standing where I am now, if you'd ask me right now, I'll tell you I nv want to go back. If I really could, I'd want to stay at this point, and live my life out drawing. Seriously, if you'd ask me to choose its that. I mean its difficult and all, and really stressful, even sometimes you can't even see forward, everything looks so uncertain. But somehow, it feels like I'm living when I draw. As if in comparision, doing anything else would seem dead. Its a strange way to put it maybe. But even if this wan't what  I was meant to do, I'd be okay.. I'd accept what God plans.. and it doesn't mean I can't draw in my freetime. Heh.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;But standing here right now, it feels a little like I was standing atop a mountain, inhaling the good air, in the midst of the majestic scenery surrounding, I feel that there are so many things out there to learn, so many things I haven't seen yet or experienced just waiting for me. I feel a little excited.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-269518950007784450?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/269518950007784450/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=269518950007784450&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/269518950007784450'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/269518950007784450'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/08/omigoodness.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-4296689292227763290</id><published>2009-07-17T21:58:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-07-17T23:23:53.795+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;It was some time ago, when I started developing the thought that people here were just more right-minded than left-minded, that I started consciously realising that the kind of atmosphere at church was just different than from the moment I stepped out and all the way till I stepped in again the next time. I just stood watching from a spectators point of view, not trying to claim which side was the right side to take. And for some reason, the kind of atmosphere I sensed in church, though familiar, wasn't a side I really wanted to take sides with. There was a thing about the way of life outside and all around that was part of what life had to be, I felt. The way people did things, or thought, outside of the church. Classmates, whoever, the society. The pastor would always be trying to pull us back into the reality of things, we are God's people, do not succumb to temptation, yes the world is tough but we have God to rely on. Why does it sound like he's making everything seem so tough? Like we ought to resist very strongly.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I don't know if anyone's actually thought of this before, I'd never would have when I was back home though. But say we take the theory that the Japanese society, regardless of whoever wants to get to know God more or not, is a more right-minded society, wouldn't that be very sad to know that it would be almost contradictory to preach the Gospel to them since the kind of activity in church is mostly left-minded? It does sound sad isn't it? It's like as though right-minded people were completely left out of the plan by the church (I'm not saying God). If you don't get what I mean, take for example, the sermons. I can tell you for sure that a right-minded person will never have the concentration to follow a sermon, much less even understand the profounding words being spoke of that come from a book they don't have the slightest idea about. And it's not about not wanting to know enough. It's just, they don't live that way. You really can't force a person who doesn't live that way to follow a path that isn't familiar to them.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;So.. I started thinking. I know God loves all of us and He's always trying to get through to even the remotest person living on the most remotest part of the planet. So that's when I thought, there must be a way, that I don't know as of yet at the moment, that God tries to reach out to the right-minded people. The Japanese people, living in their seemingly oblivious world void of the existence of any god or religion; there is a way that God exists in their society, in Japan. I just needed to discover.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;As you know (if you read the previous post) that my family came and my mom stayed behind for a while, I started to playback and think through and compare the kind of lifestyle, the kind of thinking and way of life that was me, my family and the kind of society I was in now. What was different? What's the same? What doesn't have to be different? There was something I knew to be discovered between the 2 dimensions that correlated.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I think my mom was really the star of it all. Watching her in her little world, everyday normal life in seemingly obliviousness to troubles that might be lurking. If something did come up, it was shrugged away, dismissed in an orderly fashion. Pch, it didn't need any worrying. Because, there was nothing to worry about. It was as though, my mommy, who wasn't even Christian, was being wrapped very carefully in God's arms, sheltered and shielded, kept safe, and for a reason. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;It brings me back to the image I have in my mind, of many a time I have witnessed, of Christians of the church who fret upon how they needed to reach out to all those poor people out there who don't know God. We need to preach the Word more, evangelise, let the world see the light.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;But why do we even need to fret? Because He already has them in His arms, and already has a plan for them.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;So back to these right-minded people. Why need not we be fretting that they can't reach God through the Word? Because there is something about them (in my opinion and theory) that God so loves about them that us left-minded people, who need to be fed with words in order to understand something would never be able to do.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Left-minded people (in my theory and opinion from observation and deduction) are so caught up with understanding theories and concepts, they read lots of texts and ponder deeply over words, trying to make sense over it, the world they exist in is just completely entirely made up of words. They are less sensitive to the human condition and things like... "things that go unsaid that are undestood between the parties involve". They may be able to concentrate long enough to study the textbook, but all time spent away from the books, including that which is spent with other people is completely almost like as if they turned a switch off in their brains, and they cease to exist in that aspect. Which is why, they always need to be reminded time and again, with a source that is text-base, in order to realise that God exists. That is why out dear heavenly Father who loves us left-brains has made sure that He has spelt everything out clearly and without doubt in His Word, the Bible.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Right-brains, unlike the very practical left-brainers who mostly never fail to follow logic gained from deductions through very serious thought, more of follow their instinct and spur of the moment. Before you start to jump to critical conclusion, what I mean to say is, in other words, they follow their heart. Left brain activity fails to kick in very much, so before an opinion or critic can be formed, they have already carried out what felt right to be done at the moment.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I think it might be typical for a typical left-brainer to have the image of committing murder or adultery because of what is deemed "spur of the moment". Primitive right-brainers, will they never be civilised enough to read and get the idea through their thick skulls and into their brains?? UNDERSTAND THE RULES, FOOLS.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;But yet, we do not see through to the other side, like blind fools. We did not realise that they who live on the right side are less blinded by the distraction of words, ideas, concepts, theories, airy fairy ideals, the idea of the norm that was decided by someone that we ourselves don't even know. They are more in tune to their senses, eyes, nose, mouth, ears, sense of touch, the very things that God created us with, the very physical body. They live. Like human beings that have been created by the Father for humanly purposes that he had originally planned us for. Maybe if you needed an analogy, think back to Adam and Even in the garden of Eden. What do you think life was back then?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;So I thought, these right-brained people, they live through the body given by the Father. So in turn they live the Father's will through their bodies. Everything that is needed for life is provided by God through their senses. They eat breathe and live God's will through the physical, which God provided for and all the while giving glory to God, just functioning as what the Father had planned us for! How incredible is that?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Remember the part in the Bible that says even THINKING of committing a sin is already a sin. Because if we were already functioning from the input God gave us, we wouldn't even come up with that thought to sin. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;That's when I thought, Living on the right-side, that's like being in tune to God constantly. Instead of having to be constantly reminded and then forgetting and then going back to be reminded again only to forget again, He resides inside us. Instead of thinking He is always WITH us, think He is living INSIDE me NOW. He IS me.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I'm not saying that right-siders don't need to read the Bible. All I'm saying is I'm just really happy to know that God has the right brainers in his hands and he has beautiful plans for them, even if they don't know Him yet.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-4296689292227763290?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/4296689292227763290/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=4296689292227763290&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/4296689292227763290'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/4296689292227763290'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/07/it-was-some-time-ago-when-i-started.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-4802531302611088020</id><published>2009-07-13T21:52:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-07-13T22:52:14.054+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>On my usual pondering lately about why I'm exactly here in Japan again, the fundamental difference between Japanese and Sgporeans, the former exercising comparatively less practicality and thus rigidity in ways of thinking (even though the society can be said to be a rigid one..), seemingly flinging aside all obvious forms of logic in the name of transcience and for the moment fleeting beauty, very things that would spell absolute foolishness in the mind of a typical Sgporean for the chase of deception. What makes them so different in my opinion, is that one chooses more to trust in gut feeling and prides in appreciating the direct surroundings, rather than cluttering the mind with a lot of thinking, about which would make more sense to do or what reaps more benefits logically. Of course, I don't think there's anything wrong with Sgporeans being practical, I think thats one of the traits that makes our society so efficient and educated in many ways. However, that being said, because of such a trait, certain other things are most certainly lacking. The ability to appreciate the moment, and to appreciate what makes us human. To enjoy the physical, isn't also that which makes us human?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I probably seek to leave Sg in the chase of Life. I came to one of many conclusions lately that in essential, it is everybody's goal to seek out a life source. Something that is 'living' in their opinion. And perhaps only such people will find the Life and be people who are truly 'living'. In Sg, I never saw any Life around me (not meaning that there wasn't, just didn't see or sense it), it was like I wasn't living, so I sook out Life. I left Sg for Japan. I saw what I thought was the Life in anime. I saw through and in between, what I thought was the will of the people who made the anime. I felt some kind of Life in their collection of thoughts and feelings all condensed into what we see on the screen. So I knew that there was only one place that I could ever want to go, to go to where the source of Life I thought was.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And coming here, leaving many things behind, I wondered what I was. I wondered how was I going to lead my life. There seemed to be so many questions to ask, I was homeless. No place to rest my head, every waking moment seemed to be blank silence. A deafening silence. It seemed to me even worse than living a life without the Life source. It was being dead. How could I seek the Life if I was dead?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;But thankfully, family came, and it gave me the chance to look back to see what living was about, since I had forgotten and had been dead for quite some time already. It is strange that I was once again examining the kind of 'living' that I previously could never have considered living. I looked closely; strange, that living without the Life source could feel so relaxing. It gave me the breathing space I needed to begin life again.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I pondered again what living was. Somehow I felt that before I could chase the Life source again I needed to know what living really was. That was when I noticed something that I wouldn't have noticed had I not left Sg. I noticed how my mom lived. There was an unusual sense of life that seemed to emanate from her presence. She could be doing something so extremely normal and mundane, seemingly boring for anyone interested in more exciting things. But what I noticed, was a kind of Life that was present regardless of situation and context. Like a sort of absolute existence. You could maybe describe it was a sort of excitement over anything that happened. There was a kind of interest in the things that happened or seemingly didn't happen in one's life. Every moment was never boring, never dead. Every moment seemed to be living.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Was that God trying to show me what Living was? I know that true Life is found in the one and only Living God. But I was trying to find out what He had in plan for me, the Life that I should seek on earth. What was really Living on earth? It had a rub off effect on me and I started experiencing what I thought was Living, without really being conscious of it. Maybe Living was really about not being conscious about it.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And as I started living again, I came to yet another conclusion. That what real living the way I should, and how I think should be the way, was not to overshadow His presence with thinking too much. That way, we could then be at peace with ourselves and be more aware of His presence everyday. Not being conscious in a mindly way, but sensing with our bodies, the sense He has given all of us. Without even having to start thinking to realise, we would realise from seeing. Its as though our senses are opened to the light, as how it should be in the first place.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I realise I could enjoy boring quiet moments, moments of nothingness, laugh at something where there was no person beside to hear. I realise I didn't care. Because they do not matter where Life was. Living isn't limited to context, it is absolute and once in existence will continue to exist in any situation (unless killed). It's being still, and being at peace with the self and everything else.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;So I didn't need to worry about anything else. I had the Life with me. And it would continue to be with me, as long as I knew God was with me. As I continue to seek the life God wants for me to pursue on earth, I'm thankful He taught me what Living was about.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-4802531302611088020?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/4802531302611088020/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=4802531302611088020&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/4802531302611088020'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/4802531302611088020'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/07/on-my-usual-pondering-lately-about-why.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-3586914124812484423</id><published>2009-07-03T16:59:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-07-03T19:08:00.877+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>My stomach constantly troubles me. I hope the medicine I got from the docs yesterday is going to work better than everything I've tried so far and that it works at the concentration it is at now. Depending on how my body responds I might have to be given a higher dosage or worse, have to depend on it for... ever.... until it decides to stop. Horrors.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, speaking of horrors, stupid Resistance! As soon as I started getting the hang of the game and controls and drawing wrong conclusions that it was a pushover, I get slammed with neverending missions (thought that was gonna be the end... NO?!??) and TRAP after trap! You get to the point where you start uttering swear words as a kind of reflex, not really in rage but.. those buggers! Just when you thought that was the end they start pouring out in numbers and kinds and combinations putting your judgment of which gun to use and whether to find cover or go frontal to the test. I find myself having to hit the restart mission option time and time again. When is it going to end??&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, been experiencing yet another slump since the family came and after starting seriously applying for A-1 Pictures probably due to not watching anime for a while. I still really wonder what drawing really means to me and what its really about. What does it mean to live a life by drawing? And if God has chosen this path for me how should I live it? It dawns on me yet again that I'm treading in unknown territory and where everything isn't as familiar as I think it is.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I kind of wonder what it means to be happy... but then again, I really shouldn't be thinking too much (or at all..).&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-3586914124812484423?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/3586914124812484423/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=3586914124812484423&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3586914124812484423'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3586914124812484423'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/07/my-stomach-constantly-troubles-me.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-7975708701734495670</id><published>2009-06-18T13:50:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-06-18T14:11:11.677+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Just deciding like last week or so to try out for A-1 Pictures as well, I`m now stuck with a report elaborating on what I hope to do in the company as well as my resume which together with the few illustration pieces that are supposed to be handed in at the same time are due at the career support centre in my school NEXT FRIDAY... x.x x.x  That coupled with my Mommy and Daddy and Brother on holiday NOW at my house... omgoodness. I appreciate there being teachers at the CSC to check our resumes and all but oh GOSH, I do REALLY want to get on with the written part because OBVIOUSLY the drawing part is a lot more crucial and they are NOT complete yet!! Sigh, okay it`s all going to be over soon and really even if I slip up this time there is going to be a next so I`m really okay if I screw up and they don`t call me back for an interview.. it`s just the things that I have to do now! Oh boy. Anyway, &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.a1p.jp/works/works_valkyria.html"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;this is A-1 Pictures &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;and so far, I`ve only seen &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.valkyria-anime.com/"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Valkyria Chronicles &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;that`s currently being aired on TV. They seem pretty decent and integrity to lines and quality of the series seems pretty much highly intact so far. I feel they can be trusted, which I think is probably the most important factor when considering whether to try out for a studio or not.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Argh.. anyway.. I can only hope that they can in turn trust in me from what they read in my resume and report and hopefully from what they see in my portfolio. I do believe in myself and I hope they will in me too but anyways... if the company didn`t believe in you it`s probably a good thing they don`t call you back cos it`d probably save you a lot of time and pain when you realise you don`t agree with the way they think in the company. Heh.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;GRRR. But yea, straightly speaking, A-1 really isn`t on the top of my list of studios but they are worth their money (short history of 10 years and handling productions with that level of integrity and popularity).... yes, they are worth a try. Hopefully, they would be thinking the same way. Afterall, I did dive into this field hoping to find more like minded people and friends.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay, I`m just rattling away because I really can`t figure how to change the problematic parts of my report. I don`t think it really makes a difference seriously because I`m sure the reader will be able to tell more or less when he reads the whole thing what kinda person I am.. I sure would like to heck it. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay, well, back to reality... more updates to come...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-7975708701734495670?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/7975708701734495670/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=7975708701734495670&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7975708701734495670'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7975708701734495670'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/06/just-deciding-like-last-week-or-so-to.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-4833382836086460215</id><published>2009-05-21T12:24:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-05-21T12:31:25.899+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;OMG OMG OMG I.G`s recruitment notice just came up 6 days ago. So excited about it :DD especially after reading up about their animation depts (wonder why its only in English though), it`s making me even more fired up about their round of recruiting this year. No still life, croquis drawings, computer generated art for portfolio submissions make for a rather strict sounding criteria but I guess the upside is that it makes it clearer what they`re REALLY looking for. I pray all goes well and the Lord inspires me on illust ideas and what I should do about my pf. So exciting!!!!  &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;You should read about Studio I.G too, here`s the link: &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.productionig.com/contents/people/03_/index.html"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;http://www.productionig.com/contents/people/03_/index.html&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Please pray for me too! :))&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-4833382836086460215?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/4833382836086460215/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=4833382836086460215&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/4833382836086460215'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/4833382836086460215'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/05/omg-omg-omg-i.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-264159712153815966</id><published>2009-04-14T01:12:00.006+08:00</published><updated>2009-04-14T02:03:47.100+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>OMIGOODNESS I CAN'T BELIEVE FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFEEEEEEEEEEEEE... I managed to finish drawing all the lines for so many illusto homeworks in SOOOO little time... God is really with me! :D Hehe, I hope I'd be able to continue at this pace in the days to come. You know how sometimes you're on the top of the curve and the next day you're at less than 0.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, OMGOODNESS OMGOODNESS, it's April, it's the start of the new season animes! Whoot! And the start of the very highly anticipated second series of HAGAREN. I watched it somewhat like I was on Marijuana, the typical side effect of watching any BONES production. They are so hella good. I watched I.G.'s BASARA too, which was pretty good action but it was still so caught in the game-ish kind of atmosphere I really didn't seem to find anything worth praising about the storyboarding. I hope it changes as the story goes along :S. Funny thing is its in the WARRING STATES period and the first thing you hear when Date Masamune takes the screen is 'LETSSSSS PARTAAAAAAYYYYY!!!' and no it wasn't in Japanese! Haha!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Hmm okay let's see.. I watched Satellite's BASQUASH too and it was like Bones Studio4deg high quality funky sh*t and some pretty interesting individualistic expressions in there. Keeping that on my regulars list. Haha okay and then I watched this Ristorante Paradiso. Picture an Ojisan host club.. HAHA. Okay no, it's not what you might think but that is the general idea. The story is based in Italy where this girl from the countryside goes to Rome to look for her mom who practically abandoned her (with relatives) to marry this man who isn't interested in divorcees so she's trying to keep it all hush hush and her daughter intends to look for her and spilla the beans big time. Anyway, she ends up at this restaurant whose mom's BF is the owner of. The customers who are mostly toward middle aged women go there to gawk at the toward middle aged waiters who all wear antique spectacles. Okay I guess my taste isn't really the Ojisan type but I think the character designs are decently good in standard considering its *THAT* type of anime. The preview for the second episode was WAY IYARASHII (questionable). Girl pounced on one of the waiters and attempts to str*p him, like what?! In the second episode already?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Oh man, anyway, with the start of the new animes, I hope to regularly keep up with them, which is ever so important in order to preserve a constant interest and for (obviously) new ideas. Hmmm... okay anyway, will make an exit now :O Here are the illust-o sketches I did, cheerios!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68f06780ae400000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68f06780ae400000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;"GIJINKA" (to give something non-human human characteristics) homework part(a) - Jellyfish! Actually started rough sketching at the start of spring break but threw it aside and only semi-finalised the lines on Friday.&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68f36980a1c00000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=1/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68f36980a1c00000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D1/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; "GIJINKA" homework part(b) - Okayama Prefecture! Like I was so what the.. of all things you give me a prefecture, kinda thing. Anyway, looked up Okayama and what its known for producing and some sources said fruits like Cantaloupes, grapes and white peaches. So I thought I'd so something of a prince theme. Drew that today! :D This is really one of my favorites :)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68f9bcfcbb500000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68f9bcfcbb500000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; "White Day" homework. White day is a day in Japan (3/14) where the guys are supposed to reciprocate the girls choc-giving tradition on Valentines. So for this one, I drew.. okay you can see what it is! Didn't want to spend too much time drawing too elaborate a picture cos I'm really not quite up to that standard yet so I decided to just capture the girl's reaction. Semi did this during the hols and finalised yesterday.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68fb9b4cbdf00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68fb9b4cbdf00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; "Hina Matsuri" (Doll's Festival) homework. It's a festival for the girls whereby families put up displays of Hina dolls and eat certain special foods like sushi rice, mochi and other stuff. I like baking and all so I decided to do a cake after seeing some pictures of special cakes for that occasion. Chose to do it in a kind of From the top view so I could spare myself from drawing the body.. hehe. Anything to save time! I don't have much of it anyways!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68e4dfd6a9000000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68e4dfd6a9000000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;"GothicLoli" homework: Gothic Lolita is this outrageously popular fashion style in Japan. Having said that, not everyone dresses like that so don't get the wrong idea. Think Edwardian, Vicorian, over frilly, overlacey, black, white, red, throw in some fusion with punk or rock and hey presto! Welcome to Japan! Did this today! :D&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68e501b2ae000000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da32b3127ccec68e501b2ae000000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; Haha okay and the one that drew a lot of laughter from myself... &lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;"Vesak Day" homework: STUPID TEACHER, was what I thought when I saw this one. I didn't want to draw Buddha, I mean who wants to right?! It had to include Buddha and some flowers so oh well, internalising the trait of anime to sensationalise things and to make viewers think a certain concept might be cool.. I did MR BUDDHA in a lotus enjoying the sunshine! HAHA. Oh man, he looks soooo comfortable. Some *friends* thought it looked erotic.. Haha. But I promise to cover him up properly so don't get the wrong idea!&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt; &lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;Hurhur. Okay thats all folks :)&lt;/p&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-264159712153815966?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/264159712153815966/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=264159712153815966&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/264159712153815966'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/264159712153815966'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/04/omigoodness-i-cant-believe-for-first.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-6820359305862868923</id><published>2009-04-02T20:00:00.004+08:00</published><updated>2009-04-02T20:15:48.182+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;img height="240" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da23b3127ccec69031373a5c00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" width="360" /&gt; &lt;img height="240" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da23b3127ccec691245f5aea00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" width="360" /&gt; &lt;img height="240" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9da23b3127ccec6912092db1500000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" width="360" /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;So proud of my new Toshiba iron :D So pretty and it has a retractable cord, ingenius ain't that?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-6820359305862868923?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/6820359305862868923/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=6820359305862868923&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/6820359305862868923'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/6820359305862868923'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/04/blog-post.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-3558808117569520653</id><published>2009-03-31T23:10:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-04-01T00:23:41.105+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Third week into spring break! It's the second last week and still little progress on homework! Woot. Everyone's leaving! Caro and Pablo and Jas and Nathalie have flown home today while I spent my afternoon and evening with Dione. Oh Sobs. My anime game pals Pab and Caro, you guys will be dearly missed especially everytime I discover a new super cool anime or game or when I get excited over Gashapon or the stuff in the UFO Catcher :( And Caro I will so super miss you I bet when school starts again my animation senpai :( Oh Jas, you have been one super duper Singaporean senpai who's just so fun to hang out with yet reserved enough to have a relaxing one-to-one conversation with. I'll really miss having you as a senpai I can talk to. And Nathalieeeee... I know I don't get to see you that often but somehow, I'm just glad for you that your parents came and you could really enjoy spending time with them in Japan and China, and all those nonsensical crazy moments and those over-the-top jokes where you made us rofl, yea, I'll not forget those. And oh Dione.. I can't believe it was our last day today, somehow it was really hard for me to realise that I'll never be able to spend time just talking bad about stupid Watanabe and all the stupid things in school, or seeing you around school and talking in English/ Singlish where nobody else understands. Haha, being with you really helped me to take a break from my surroundings and you have been very kind as a senior to me, thanks so much for all the help you've given me.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Well, sighs. Seniors have left and now we are the seniors. Somehow I don't really see the need to be emotionally involved in it all. It's really not the end of anything, just the start. I really wonder how this school year is going to start. I do have my hopes, but more importantly, I hope for the good of myself that I'd be able to keep my head in one piece to progress and grow in enthusiasm the path that the Lord has set out for me. To set my priorities in life right and knowing that some things (actually everything else) just aren't worth putting God in second place.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay okay, so what's been happening the past week and all? Let's put some numbers to them:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;1. Started reading Manga again! :DD I'm glad my interest to read has seen a revival especially how hectic schoolwork had ironically destroyed my enthusiasm for it. Started on a new (old) series called Dragon Voice and am so swooning like a fangirl over the guys in there. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;2. Discovery of *DRUMROLL* *DRUMROLL* *DRUMROLL*................... even more new recipes! In light of the new school year starting soon and a forecast of hectic school days to come, I have been on a search for easy no-fuss cheap yummy recipes and recipes good for cooking up in bulk and freezing. Also, not to mention recipes that will go EASY on the stomach as I foresee many a late night to come and resulting stomach troubles. And the search has been quite a fruitful (and yummy) one :D&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;ul&gt;&lt;li&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Fruit smoothie recipes for hectic mornings when we have no time to prepare breakfast!! Throw in strawberries, yogurt and other fruit into the blender, whir, and instant stomach filling breakfast that's good for your health. I intend to buy lots of fruits and freeze them in drinkable portions in separate ziplock bags and pull one up every morning. All I need to do is get a blender from Amazon...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/li&gt;&lt;/ul&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/p&gt;&lt;ul&gt;&lt;li&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Tzatziki Sauce! This is one very clever recipe! It tastes almost identical to sourcream but so much cheaper because its made of yogurt! So economically friendly and stomach friendly too, esp if you use low-fat yogurt. Strain yogurt through coffee filters to get a firmer yogurt, mix with salt, black pepper, lemon juice, garlic and leave to mellow in the fridge and hey presto! Wonderful sourcream like dip that goes great with veggie sticks, chips, breadsticks, or as a sauce in sandwiches!! :D So yummy&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/li&gt;&lt;/ul&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/p&gt;&lt;ul&gt;&lt;li&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;And the newest that sounds promising but have yet to try (will try soon though am so excited.. haha) Tofu burgers!!! Veggie burgers def sound cool to me because I don't have to deal with stinky meat that expires fast, rots in your digestive tract (haha) and a pain to clean up after. Not to mention all that grease that seeps out from the ground meat patties, gross. Anyway, the genius behind veggie burgers? Contains proteins from the main ingredient: either beans or tofu so I don't have to worry about my protein intake if I don't take meat. A lot healthier to make, and since you can make patties out of them, you can go ahead and make a bulk at one go and freeze them to pull 'em out on school days for a quick sandwich to make for sch or a quick dinner item. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/li&gt;&lt;/ul&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/p&gt;&lt;ul&gt;&lt;li&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Lastly, I hope to be able on the weekends to make lots of Roomali Roti dough and fry the rotis up and freeze them so I can defroze them on a school day to use as wraps for sandwiches. I can see this perfect plan all coming together now... bwahaha.. Sandwich wrap, check. Burger, check. Sauce, check. Hahahaahaaaa... now I just need some of the sandwich veggies and I've got it all set.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/li&gt;&lt;/ul&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/p&gt;&lt;ul&gt;&lt;li&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Also, am trying out a new way of doing things in the kitchen in hope of speeding things up and reducing the weekday hassle over meal prep. I have been washing all my vegetables and fruits immediately after I buy them and storing them in ziplock bags so I can pull them out straight and cook immediately. Despite that, certain veggies still need to be cut upon usage, like onions and tomatos (can't imagine precutting them) but I think this might help when it comes to the leafy veggies. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/li&gt;&lt;/ul&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Haha okay, so many reforms in the meal department but as for the animation dept I can't say the same. Haha. I think I have been stressing myself out too much the last year worrying about homework and deadlines I think I really need a break from it all so that I can continue working on my course in sanity. I decided I think it's important to sustain your interest in anime and games and what really made you enjoy animation in the first place otherwise there would be no meaning in doing anime. And then, I decided that it's important and only right that I be who I am in my natural state even if it means that I may seem antisocial running home everyday and usually refusing to hang out with people on weekdays because there's school the next day and frankly I really love playing games and reading manga on my own time rather than waste time on shallow conversations or tiring myself out with company. It's really who I am, not that I don't like people. Yea, who's to care about all these distractions of irritatingly bothersome people who can't leave me alone around me and the down right mean over-dishing out of hw all the time? It really isn't worth losing more years of my life over things like these. I'm really just going to be who I am and honor God as I think fit. And I pray that God would guide me and show me the clear path I need to walk, to give me the strength and soundness of mind to deal with temptations and grant me the endurance during the grueling moments, especially when there's nobody around to confide in.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Wow, it sure isn't going to be all flowers and sunshine on the road ahead, but I'm not alone. I hope I never forget how to relax (so important.....).&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-3558808117569520653?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/3558808117569520653/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=3558808117569520653&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3558808117569520653'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3558808117569520653'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/03/third-week-into-spring-break-its-second.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-2313568258283244763</id><published>2009-03-17T00:41:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-03-17T03:59:30.925+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;ONE WEEK has passed since Spring break started and I'm slightly amazed-cum-slightly horrified that I have been willingly and conveniently shoving aside the ton of homework dished out to us even more conveniently by the teachers. Anyway, I think this past one week has seen some progress in destressifying the self. A lot of the friends I hang out with here or appreciate hanging out with are seniors leaving for home at the end of this month so with the holidays here, what better excuse than to spend lots of time just having fun in spending time with them before they go back.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;That coupled with the fact that it does get rather lonely at times living in such a spacious apartment gave me a very good excuse to 'throw' a party for my senior friends today. It's my first time really planning for a party even though it was just for 5 people and I couldn't stop worrying myself whether the food would be enough. I kept thinking it wouldn't be and kept rearranging all the different combinations of foods I could make and thinking up a menu I could go with. Which all in the end burned down to over-thinking. I planned a menu with like a starter of snacks in the form of crackers and hard toast and veggie sticks with dips,  the main of wraps with toppings like veggies, ham, egg mayo and tuna mayo, an extra snack (since people are always more interested in snacking at parties) of popcorn and chocolate cake as desert. And everyone was full after the wraps we had to bypass the popcorn! I even thought it was missing a hearty dish and was even contemplating a soup or curry. This is so funny. But all in all I think I did learn some things about party planning:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;1. Foods that your guests are not accustomed to eating on regular basis will not be popular. Even if you might think they taste pretty good. I guess people are just not very adventurous on average. I made an avocado dip I thought went pretty well with the crackers and basically I felt I was the only one tucking into it. My guests weren't serial consumers of tuna or thousand island (some not even knowing what thousand isle was) so there were a lot of leftovers of those. Foods like the egg mayo and ham, foods common to us everyday were devoured though.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;2. When buying drinks, buy a KNOWN brand. Haha. I say this because I bought a bottle of 'Cola' that wasn't Coke and NOBODY opened it. I think they were scared to try it.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;3. Everybody has a sweet tooth so there's ALWAYS room for dessert. When full, people will reject snacks and fruit but where there's chocolate cake or brownies, they will find the space to fit 'em in.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, for the wraps, I used this recipe titled "Roomali Roti" on allrecipes.com and it was exactly like the Roti Prata they sell frozen at the supermarket! I'm sure it was missing the fatty ingredient that makes Roti Prata taste like Roti Prata, which I think is ghee, because they tasted a lot less flavourful, but other than that THEY WERE EXACTLY THE SAME. So yay, I made Roti Prata and I can make it everytime I eat curry from now one :D One more option to rice and bread. And it was so simple to make. The dough only needed 45 minutes of resting before shaping rolling and frying in the pan.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Then for the chocolate cake, I actually tried out this Chocolate Mayo Cake recipe, also from the same site. Mayo was like the highlight of today's menu. I had bought the large size Mayo bottle and was planning to make full use of it. When you can buy a lot of something cheaply it's always more cost effective to include recipes and that make use of it in your menu isn't it? So tuna mayo, egg mayo, thousand isle (which is actually a combination of ketchup and mayo) and of course, we have to have the Mayo cake shouldn't we? &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Apparently, this cake has a bit of history dating back to the Depression where mothers baked this for their children when eggs and the like were very expensive (and mayo wasn't? oh well...). In the gist of it, instead of eggs and the oil component in cakes mayo is used in place. And when it baked up and I tasted it, I wouldn't have been able to tell it had mayo in it. It tasted like a chocolate cake! Which was a surprise and a relief because that meant it was edible and my guests would eat it and I didn't have to throw it away.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;It was such a fun and I wouldn't have been able to imagine before that it would've been just that holding a party for people to fill up space in my house, eat the food I cooked, play and be completely undisturbed by my washing up and making sure everything was in its place. Even though some might say its as though nobody cared as long as they had free food and someone's house to bum around at, I was just contented to cook all those different recipes, even springing up those new untried recipes that some of them didn't try (maybe because that meant I got to try all sorts of different foods too), and to clean up after everyone(maybe because I'm so used to washing up) and having them completely ignore me while I did the work I had to do. Maybe I just enjoyed being busy doing something and being distracted from the food rather than just sitting at the table and chuck everything down and get really stuff in the middle of it all (maybe thats why they got so full so soon?). Haha.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, all in all, this was really an experience in itself and this won't be the last time I throw a party. Hopefully more adventurous and cooperative friends will be more gracious to leave me with fewer leftovers in the future.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-2313568258283244763?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/2313568258283244763/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=2313568258283244763&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/2313568258283244763'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/2313568258283244763'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/03/one-week-has-passed-since-spring-break.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-2006120370147403213</id><published>2009-02-15T01:01:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-02-15T02:47:12.710+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;It is 2.05am 15th Feb, my birthday, hehe.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Some people might think its very SAD to not celebrate your own birthday but I guess I kind of accepted the situation I'm in already. Anyway, thinking I might not have the time for celebration today thought I'd at least blog to 'commemorate' what little memory I might have of today.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Hmm. I'm going to stay up to try and get my storyboard done for this story our teacher gave us about this woodcutter who finds a wounded crane in the forest. It's due on Monday and I've only done about 30 pages, which is slightly less than the half way mark, which is also why I don't think I will have the time to do anything tomorrow.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, what I particularly remember about this week was.. Friday! The 13th! I spent the whole of Thursday night decorating the sugar cut out cookies I baked and wrapping all the cookies. I lost a lot of sleep over that and while I was doing all that I really wondered whether there was something wrong with my brain for baking so many cookies. But in the end I was happy I did because when I went to school a lot of the girls brought cookies and cake and chocolates to give away so I had something to give in return. To backtrack on my baking history for the week, I baked banana choc chip muffins on Sunday and froze them, baked most of the cut out cookies on Wednesday and one batch of &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Chocolate-Crinkles-II/Detail.aspx"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;chocolate crinkle cookies &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;(they taste exactly like brownies and have a really professional looking crinkled look but are real easy to make!). I bought a rabbit cookie cutter just for those cut out cookies and I realise how much work cut out cookies are to make! The dough has to be chilled to be firm enough to roll out, gets soft and sticky easily, and you can't bake too many at one go. So it took a lot of time just to finish baking all that dough, but they tasted nice annd buttery when done plus they were in cute rabbit shapes :). Okay and then on Thursday evening, I baked up the rest of the existing dough. Decided to frost the cut out cookies so I made a frosting, and with colored chocolate rice and chocolate icing pen I decorated the top of all the cut out cookies (There were so many!)&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay so besides being all happily hyped over the giving and receiving of baked goods in class on Friday, I kind of enjoyed class and the teachers (weird way of saying but..). Had a really long talk with my Brazilian friend during lunchbreak about old cartoons and shows like Mighty Max and Scooby Doo and Batman and about European languages that made me really feel like studying some of them! He devoured the banana muffins (yes I thought they tasted deliciously banana-y too so I really wanted them to taste them too!)! The teacher we have on Friday mornings loves talking to him about European countries and stuff there like scenery and buildings and just stuff basically related to things like that. It's the same teacher who corrected the waves and stream for me, the same teacher I aspire to be if I could. His name is Hane sensei and I will promptly refer to him by that name from now for convenience. Anyway, I asked what they talked about and he told me the sensei loves Europe and has gone there a few times and he bikes to get around. And I thought wow, still so genki at this age! Haha.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, funny thing was, Hane sensei returned me my stream animation in class that day and somehow later during class, this guy from the Netherlands came to look-see (he was accompanied by a few of the sch staff) and Hane sensei wanted to show how the foreign students were coping with our work so he asked me back for the stream so he could have it run through the quickchecker for them to watch. Personally, I just find that there are some things not quite fanciful with the movement but the sensei had to say he thought it was good and he gave me an A for it. SENSEI! SHHH.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Speaking of Hane sensei, I gave him some cookies during breaktime and he asked me if they were manjyuu (japanese sweet pau) and I was like I'm really sorry, but I don't know how to make manjyuu. Haha. He seemed to be really nice that day, I was trying to understand the concept of the dog's skeletal structure on paper and he gave me some points even though I hadn't asked him anything. He even drew out some pictures for me which were pretty helpful. Actually, since the week when I openly said during Kinoshita sensei's class (the other movement teacher we have on the same day who happens to be really good buddies with Hane sensei) I aspire to be like Hane sensei, I've been getting some vibes that Hane sensei KNOWS. And that might be why he seems (I think!) to be a lot friendlier than what I remember. Which to me feels rather awkward, I really kind of wish he didn't know. Kinoshita sensei is such a siren!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Speaking of which, I'm still stuck doing his storyboard for the animation he wanted us to make; the one where I'm supposed to make the camera revolve a full circle around a guy serving tennis, which is so crappily hard. Again I wonder whats wrong with me for choosing such a difficult movement. Even a forehand would have been a lot easier even though tennis in general is prob really hard to do. I bought a tennis magazine a few weeks ago that had shots of tennis players movement meant for image training so that day I decided I'd really study the serve before I started drawing because I still couldn't visualise in 3D where each part was supposed to be at. I took notes too. Good thing the sensei was busy with something else and wasn' t there more than half the time as somehow I feel I can't concentrate with him walking around and peeping over my back. He is such a distraction! &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, I had to pop off to the toilet at some point and when I returned, Horrors! The both of them were standing around my seat! I wondered what they were nosying at and Hane sensei started asking me what I was drawing, because he seemed to have noticed the tennis magazine there. He had to mention that he thought the magazine was really good material (he's so into collecting material useful for visualising movement and for designs). He previously asked whether I knew who Nishikori Kei was, and I realised after some checking up that he's the new Japanese tennis star who is said to have the potential to make it to the top 10. And he happened to be on the cover for that issue. Anyway, I felt kinda embarrassed they were there because my storyboard (also known in JApanese as an 'E Conte' no its not french) is so completely sucky and not near completion. I previously caught Kinoshita sensei looking through my Croquis book which wasn't even the one I use for Croquis, it was supposed to be for Mosha (where I look at existing images and try to duplicate them). And he was daringly sitting on my seat and flipping away without telling me anything! Sneaky! Keep your paws off my Croquis sensei! Haha. Maybe I should be happy he at least looked a bit because he's the one who tells us to draw lots of Croquis (like ten pages a day during winterbreak, hellooo?) and never asks to look at them.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Kinoshita sensei had to give us another one of his speeches just before class ended that day and he asked us how many of us were actually thinking of looking for jobs in the studio because lots of people didn't really seem to be serious with their work and I guess he was wondering whether they weren't that serious about it all. I guess the crux of his speech that day was that he wanted to tell us to be more decisive and to actually think about things and more importantly decide and make our own conclusions. It is okay to still be in the midst of deciding what we want to do but he said, we will really have to make our decision after summerbreak in our second year. Not only is time wasted when we can't decide whether we want to do something and therefore not put in effort during class, but its also troublesome for the teachers and for people in the studios because when the students can't decide they tend to drag their feet and not follow through properly and everyone's time and effort is being wasted. He had to add that he used to be like that until an experience changed the way he taught. He asked us to guess what it was (and no it wasn't a life-threatening situation) and he said it was something that all of us were going to experience in time to come. Nobody could be bothered to guess, haha, not surprisingly I know I wouldn't have been able to guessed it either, but he said in the end, it was about Love relationships. And I was like... Hmmmmmm... I see, kinda thing. Interesting. And he told us to write down what we think were our strengths and weaknesses and ask our friends to evaluate them casually, which I thought was another interesting part of his speech. He said at the place where he used to work part-time, the boss had told him to do the same and when he showed the boss, he said he felt his weaknesses were his strengths and what he thought were his strengths were his weaknesses. Hmmm... Interesting. I always think Kinoshita sensei's speeches are interesting and always impart some important points. Even though I'd say that everyody thinks different and lives by their philosophy I like how he's someone who thinks about things and shares about his experiences. I mean, how many japanese people are willing to tell you what they REALLY think?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;(It's 3.30am now!)&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay! So that was Friday! Can't believe I long-winded Friday now I have no time and energy to talk about anything else. Let's see.. (in summary)&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;1. I bought a Chocolate Fondue set a few days ago! I think it's really cute, it's red and comes with everything, candles, piercing forks, spatula, and even 2 bars of milk chocolate! I invited a friend the other day and we had chocolate fondue! But I realise I don't like eating fruit with chocolate! And it's way heaty and unhealthy eating so much chocolate at one go. Terrible for health. Maybe I should try eating something healthier with the set. I really like the idea of whatevers in the pot being kept nice and warm over a candle flame. Maybe I can try eating warm oatmeal or wheatbix with fruit, haha, while watching TV! Keeps the mixture warm while I eat intermittently! Haha! Lame! Sorry! But will try one of these days probably, before the weather turns warmer.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;2. Had another friend over for dinner and desert today! She's also Singaporean and studies in the same course. But she's graduating soon and going back to sg, boohoo. She's prob the only one I can talk to about what happens in class because she knows the teachers too and she's also studying Animation, while the rest of the peeps I know who speak English prob wont have the patience to listen to me talking about what funny things the senseis did. She bought cake and they tasted so heavenly good! Nothing like the cream cakes in Singapore! In fact you can't begin to compare because they're completely on a different level. She bought them at a shop near school so we agreed we'd go buy cake together after school one of these days and enjoy our cake! Yay!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;3. After chocolate fondue, I decided my eating habits have been getting way out of hand and I need to control them better. Which is actually hard to, because eating out of anxiety is just such a naturally human thing to do and you can't not eat when you're with company because they'd feel weird and then there wouldn't be anything to talk about. Plus, you just tend to eat more when you live alone precisely because there's no one else to eat the leftovers! Pah! Let's manage ourselves better!  Poor digestive system, just hang on there a coupla weeks more and I promise I will eat good properly healthy meals three times a day, exercise, and drink lots of water T.T&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay it's 3.50am! Horrors, and still left with more than half of the E Conte and a very full stomach from dinner and cake. Going to take a nap and wake up and hopefully work on my E Conte. Oh yea it's my birthday, haha. zZZz!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-2006120370147403213?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/2006120370147403213/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=2006120370147403213&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/2006120370147403213'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/2006120370147403213'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/02/it-is-2.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-260018739621452430</id><published>2009-02-07T18:34:00.003+08:00</published><updated>2009-02-07T21:29:23.794+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I think this week ended off really lazily; I feel like I've been slacking off towards the end. I started Sunday and Monday night sleeping only 6 hrs in total trying to finish this illustration on Photoshop that was supposed to be due Monday. Next time I'm not going to care and just submit it within the week since there doesn't seem to be any problem even if we go over the deadline.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;strong&gt;TUESDAY&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, it wasn't so smart to deprive the body of sleep because I woke up Tuesday morning with my head spinning (and I REALLY mean spinning) and I had to put myself back into bed as it would've been too dangerous to go to school in that state. So I went to school late on Tuesday, in time for the second half of lessons. We had to draw our bedroom, in proper perspective and proportion and draw in two people -one sitting one standing. Well, I sleep in the living room so, I can't really remember the no. of tatami mats made up the floor size (they measure floorspace by tatami mats in Japan). I know the two bedrooms are 5.5 and 6 in the apartment I live but the living room.. Ah well, decided to heck it and go by feeling and the rough draft I did the night before:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bc763880d00000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=1/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bc763880d00000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D1/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;strong&gt;WEDNESDAY&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Wednesday sketching class, the teacher had a bench dragged into the classroom and made us draw people doing stuff sitting on the bench. He would have us draw one person at a time to make up a complete scene. Like for the first drawing, he put on a spiderman mask and sat at one end holding up a pen and for the second part he had another guy sit at the other end with his mouth open (like he was gonna eat the pen). Most unfortunately I had to go pose cos my name was drawn and I had a guy classmate lie on my lap (!) not literally of course. The teacher gave me a katana and said I could choose between wanting to kill him or protect him, like a bnodyguard. Anyway, second half of the day, we finished watching the remaining bit of The Magnificient Seven, I know it already sounds trashy and some people might say the same too. It's a American movie with a plot based on and mostly almost copied from The Seven Samurai but I kinda liked it! I think its my first proper Cowboy movie I watched and I kinda liked watching what cowboys looked like on screen. The teacher also gave back the results from this test we did like last year.. its the kind they might make you do when you apply for a job. It's got general knowledge questions, math, english, japanese lang and this essay you had to write. And I really can't believe I got an A for it, in spite of writing it in my less than perfect Japanese. I think its incredible, they read the entire essay sectioning it commenting on anything that should be or shouldn't be in there. I was kinda surprised but, I think that made me wake up to the fact that knowing how to speak and write properly in order to convey your thoughts is important, even if there weren't any tests for it. Have been feeling recently like I've been lazying the language cos I couldn't be othered to and suddenly realise that I couldn't remember a lot of words. Okay anyway, after that, the teacher started giving his lecture and he's the one we can't stay awake listening to even if out lives were at stake. So I started drawing, beats doing nothing really (yea, its not finished):&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bad8709ec00000050O30AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=3/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bad8709ec00000050O30AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D3/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bad8709ec00000050O30AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=3/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bc6e0492600000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9dc26b3127ccec61bc6e0492600000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;strong&gt;THURSDAY&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Then Thursday was totally unproductive. I was late for class and not knowing how to get started on our background assignment I practically almost left the whole canvas blank (on photoshop). Instead, my classmate from Brazil ended up explaining to me how you start by deciding on the color of the sky and determine what color the buildings will be based on the kind of light that falls on them. Color just completely escapes me at this point of time. He recommended this tutorial which is totally the bomb: &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.3dtotal.com/team/Tutorials_2/return_fire-escape/return-fire_escape_01.asp"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;http://www.3dtotal.com/team/Tutorials_2/return_fire-escape/return-fire_escape_01.asp&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt; This guy has vision and impeccable knowledge of colors and perpective. He knows which lines are the important ones which you can see makes a picture look so real without having to touch it up. The sky's the limit.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;FRIDAY&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And on friday (yesterday), I was still trying to finish my stream animation (a mountain stream &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CZgKyoizT8&amp;amp;feature=PlayList&amp;amp;p=A7AE4C2C788E9A12&amp;amp;index=0"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CZgKyoizT8&amp;amp;feature=PlayList&amp;amp;p=A7AE4C2C788E9A12&amp;amp;index=0&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;"&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt; a bit like this I guess) that my teacher helped me out correcting the day before. His class was just next door. When I checked it with the computer (using this program called Quickchecker) I realised for the second time how incredible he is as an animator. He makes the bits of reflection on moving water look like they're melting into a new shape that so makes it look like the kind of moving water you'd see in a stream. Out of his hands come life, like seriously. I'm just wowed everytime. Anyway, managed to hand that in, but haven't yet started on the dog walking which I wont have time to do in class anymore since he just started on dog running. Looks like I'll have to complete it during springbreak.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, during afternoon class, we practically didn't have class when the teacher came in and gave us a long speech in another attempt to wake us up from our daze. Apparently our senpais have been giving the school a bad name, how they get hired and quit within a few months, not bothering to go to interviews and not declining job offers until the last minute. He said quite a lot of important things but I really had to go to the toilet. He went on and on for like 1 hr 20 minutes until he finally remembered to give us a break. Anyway, he wanted us to know that you don't get hired and quit within 1 - 3 months saying its not your cup of tea. He said you wouldn't know until you've been there 3 years, or if the job is tough, at least 5. At this rate, he said there'd really be nothing to expect from this generation of animators, since there'd be so few people rising to the top. He wanted us to know that we have to work hard, not dreading at it but working at it, and there'd be people who're out to bully you just to see how long you'd last. In the world of grown ups people get pushed around and there are always people who would take advantage of you at any opportunity there'd be, so he said, you have got to know how to bear it and carry on (such a japanese thing). And then he said, there are two types of 'working hard' of which are separated by one factor: Stamina. Stamina will allow you to bring the fruits of your hard hard labor a step further and allows you to keep going on. Without, you can only achieve that much with your hard work and that would be all that you'd be capable of doing.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Well he talked a looootttt.. and then he made us tell him our vision for the future. And I had to start. And he said don't tell me your dream is to stand atop the merlion and scream (like what's with the Japanese and the merlion?). Finally decided I'd say I wanted to be a really good pro. And he said like what. So I said I wanted to be like that teacher (the one who drew the waves and stream) because I could feel something everytime he drew and I wanted to be like that. He's actually quite good friends with that teacher so I kind of wondered if he told him (he was teaching the class next door again). Apparently he used to have a fanclub full of high school girls but he wasn't interested in all that stuff then. Haha.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If I wrote everything that was said down I'd never see the end of this post. Something seems to happen everyday even when nothing happens, which is interesting I guess. I wonder though whats going to happen next year when we start job hunting. That's gonna open a whole new chapter to living here. Guess I better do something now, it's 10.20pm already.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-260018739621452430?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/260018739621452430/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=260018739621452430&amp;isPopup=true' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/260018739621452430'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/260018739621452430'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/02/i-think-this-week-ended-off-really.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-1405576345456106894</id><published>2009-01-30T20:39:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-01-30T21:51:27.887+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;It is Friday night, ONE week from when our year end projects were due. It does seem longer than that, those days of toil seem so far and forgotten probably since they're too painful and tiresome a memory. I think the start of this week sparked a changed of direction in my thoughts. Monday morning lesson I listened to my teacher talk about the inefficiencies and unfairness in Japanese anime studios when my Brazilian classmate and friend brought up the fact that animators in America get paid so much more than in Japan. In fact, another friend of mine added that even a TV extras get paid more. What I remembered from his reply was, basically, nothing has changed since the Edo era. And I thought, how very true that was. The rich and those in authority are still corrupt, if not in entirety living lives in which corruption is a tradition, siphoning off money so the poor remain poor. The director gets the most money while the ones at the end get peanuts, struggling to pay off bills and the rent. It is rather strange, is it not, that in this time and period no laws have been set in place to protect such a group of people or no unions have even been formed to fight for any rights. What I make of it all is that the abused remained abused living lives of ignorance and when they finally make it out of the hole they in turn abuse the next generation thinking its all supposed to be the natural way of life. And why, perhaps because it is all a ploy of the government and those in authority to nurture a society that DOES NOT THINK, and therefore, do not know how to retaliate or speak out when the odds are against them. What I observe is INDIFFERENCE, to right and wrong, to beings other than the self and the meaning of things, one of which more importantly is Life itself.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Okay now that I've spat that all out and wash myself of thinking of these faceless beings, let me move on in topic. I never fail to always question myself the meaning of being here and studying what I study now. And it seems now that my eyes and thoughts are on something else, more than about meeting deadlines for assignments and feeling the dire need to improve. It's like I'm looking for something and it does not lie in school or what it provides for me. It's like I'm waiting to realise what I am here for and at the moment I haven't yet met with what or who I'm supposed to meet.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Okay anyway, side stepping those thoughts again, besides that interesting little talk with the teacher on Monday (you rarely hear a Japanese with opinions as noble as his - if there was a teacher whose words you could trust I'd think it'd be him) a teacher who works with us on moving objects, like the expression of wind or moving water and animals just really moved me with.. I don't know.. with just who he was. I had asked him to check my animation on waves and while he sat down correcting the movement he pointed at one point to one of the bends in a wave and said it just suddenly appeared out of nowhere. He said, these things don't appear out of nowhere, "the shape has to be given birth". Those words just came right out and pounded on my heart. It was like a sneak attack and I took a heavy blow. I really felt the weight of those words. And while I watched him patiently erase my lines, correct and put in some color to differentiate the bends, every one of those 14 pages, I watched him "give birth" to a wave and give it life across each page, as though it were a child and finally towards the end of the last page where it disappeared out of the frame, as though he was sending it off after its journey to where it had to go. As though he was finishing his journey with the wave. I was so touched just to watch him scribble. Because I sensed that with every line he put on the paper was a sense of responsibility to the shape he was giving birth to. Every line had weight and was given life. He could have just told me straight in just a few sentences what exactly looked wrong with my animation or correct just a few lines to give me an idea but what he did was sit out through the entire thing correcting it in entirety. I almost felt slightly close to tears when he got to page 13 and seeing this slight bump that was supposed to be a wave I placed in there that seemed to appear suddenly, he gave it more shape and colored it in a different color, then realising he had to give meaning to it, he went back again through all the pages a second time to plot out its life until page 13, meaning he had to erase and redraw in part what he had drawn out until then. And he did so without uttering an extra word or complaint, and he didn't do what I thought was the obvious - erasing away that extra bump. Instead, it seemed like he was trying to give meaning to what we had tried to make of the waves, he was trying to justify them rather than setting an absolute standard of what was right or wrong. It was there and than I felt like there was a strong pillar supporting me and propping me up. This is probably the first time I've been so awed by someone firsthand. Just watching him draw for one hour, I felt like I got to know more about his character. You know people rarely like to display care and concern outright and I guess he's the same but how in the act of drawing can exude such warmth really was quite an experience in itself. If it's close to anybody I want to be like, I would hope to be someone like him.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-1405576345456106894?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/1405576345456106894/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=1405576345456106894&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/1405576345456106894'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/1405576345456106894'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/01/it-is-friday-night-one-week-from-when.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-3932202316843785865</id><published>2009-01-07T22:53:00.005+08:00</published><updated>2009-01-07T23:51:15.290+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;div&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Somehow just before I hopped into bed (or sofa) last night I suddenly found some excitement in going to school today. Probably hoping that being surrounded with classmates would give me more drive to do what I had to do. The first half of the day was sketching class and the sensei started off with the usual croquis. In his attempt to jerk the class back into focus he reduced the time from the usual 4-5minutes to 2min30sec and made some classmates do some radical poses in a bid to spark our interest perhaps.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;I think the 1 minute speed drawings on posemaniacs.com has quite helped to imprint through my thick skull how fast I have to draw and which details are more crucial to be drawn in and others to be left out within a certain amount of time. I guess when you've worked at 1 minute 4~5 minutes seems like pssh. Most of all, it helped me keep my fingers and brain on the go cos one thing I realised about drawing is that its like a clock that resets itself to zero when you sleep and when you start a new day anything could happen. So doing croquis everyday and not just once a day but a few times at least would I guess keep your brain from forgetting the feeling of sensing the lines and perspective.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, at the second half of the class, the sensei asked us to form groups and draw our friends' faces, each facing front, left and right. And then he showed us how to express lighting. He even did one where the light source came from the bottom, and if you can imagine, sort of turns a person's face slightly scary, as though they had some evil intention or telling a ghost story.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Some pictures I took from my current croquis books:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65ac2147d6200000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=1/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65ac2147d6200000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D1/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; (In class today)&lt;/p&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65b9c84dca100000050O30AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=3/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65b9c84dca100000050O30AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D3/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; (In class today) Sensei helped me do the one above, where the lighting is from the bottom. Kinda hiliarious.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65adf61bcb100000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65adf61bcb100000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; (Second half of school today) What happens when you can't find someone to draw for croquis...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65b6605dc5d00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65b6605dc5d00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65b6e13dc4f00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65b6e13dc4f00000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(During winter break) Those 1 minute things on posemaniac.. give it a go.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65bc5e09c7100000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65bc5e09c7100000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(Winter break) Did some hands too... basically anything see in front of you can be done for croquis.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65acac5fc8700000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=0/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65acac5fc8700000040O00AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D0/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;(1/5 After New Year Party) Courtesy of Changyang. Tired junior from the hostel I used to stay at who volunteered to pose. &lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65aa9ad3d7600000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f=0/ps=50/r=1/rx=720/ry=480/"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 720px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 480px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://im1.shutterfly.com/media/47b9df26b3127ccec65aa9ad3d7600000050O10AaN2rVm0cN2IPbz4Y/cC/f%3D0/ps%3D50/r%3D1/rx%3D720/ry%3D480/" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;p&gt;(1/5 After New Year Party wee hours of the night) Courtesy of Monica and Mita. Had no space on my book..&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;That's it for now.. I know I will regret posting these up some day though.&lt;/p&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-3932202316843785865?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/3932202316843785865/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=3932202316843785865&amp;isPopup=true' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3932202316843785865'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3932202316843785865'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/01/somehow-just-before-i-hopped-into-bed.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-8823839254640339228</id><published>2009-01-06T22:55:00.002+08:00</published><updated>2009-01-06T23:10:36.302+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Wah, I can't believe I'm actually back here on my very underutilised blog after what, a year or so of absence? I think my English has really gone wayyy down the drain after being here for so long and speaking almost close to nothing but Japanese everyday. Sometimes I even forget the words I want to say or even how to structure a sentence (SCARY!).&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Hmmm. Thoughts... I don't know what to say or how to begin. Just so many things have happened and are happening. Overall morale at the moment is well... not very cheerful to say the least. Downcast skies and a gloomy forecast for the near future, a downtrodden spirit, close to fallen warrior. Haha.. Why am I such a sad existence. The more I draw or dwelve into the artistic realm it seems as though I get further away from what I try to grasp. Why does it feel like such a forlorn relationship? Strange.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, it's the night of the last day of winter break. I'll have to wake up at 6.30am tomorrow morning to go to school. Thus the madness will start again and so will depression, probably. However hard I try to do my homework it always takes such a long time, not to mention not being able to achieve the results I try to work towards. Maybe its just Art? But, it does feel like its killing me, a little everyday.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Hmmm, anyway, not much time to elaborate further I guess. Have got quite some things due tomorrow and haven't quite completed yet. Hopefully, I will update again soon and will be able to add more description to my puny little situation now. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;To anyone who reads this, thanks for reading. After all this time of keeping quiet, thanks for bothering to even check.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-8823839254640339228?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/8823839254640339228/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=8823839254640339228&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/8823839254640339228'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/8823839254640339228'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2009/01/wah-i-cant-believe-im-actually-back.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-2984205062902541340</id><published>2008-03-29T01:11:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2008-03-29T02:45:17.435+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;The slightly more than 3 weeks I've spent back home in sg so far I've met up with some friends, people who would bother come see me since basically, I couldn't bother to go look for people, really. A rather sluggish habit but seriously, I don't care. The remaining 9/10 of the time... let's see... I worked on re-establishing a decent relationship with the PS2, finding no better an excuse to stay up those late nights again, Pssh I'm on holiday anyways. Then the weekends go to the brother since I only get to see him then. We went to Botak Jones which really does serve up good quality food, we watched V for Vendetta on dvd (interesting :)), then for no reason really I patronised the ice cream man who passes by our house on sundays, 4pm (he's never late!) and I made my brother have some ice cream too. We exchanged some 'gifts', some 'peace offerings', so now the green Cactuar plushie's sitting in his display cabinet and I've got an extra action figure - Cloud Strife FFVII to bring back with me to my alone apartment. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, aside from the things people have been telling me: You look fairer, your complexion has become better, You look the same, You never changed, you haven't put on extra weight, I know the 'me' that grew up in sg still remains very much intact which is probably why people say they think I've not changed at all, I don't think I have either, but I know something that's changed and its perspective. I think logically anybody would be able to understand that being immersed in a different environment from the previous one is definitely going to let you see the same images in a different light. I'm just experiencing it firsthand.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;One of these experiences was when I looked through my old drawings, stuff I did actually had pride in and kept throughout the years even though they weren't many and I would take them out once in a while to have a look again. I know I've been taking them out time and again probably not frequent enough for me to get tired of them yet still for some reason I still experience just a slight tinge of nostalgia and a wee bit of fascination at the art (if we can even call them that) I call my drawings. Anyway, this time round, what surprised me when I looked at them again was how much potential I began to see in those drawings I made as a kid. I thought, How different my life would be if I were to be sent to study Anime in Japan at that time! Why I might've become a regular Japanese kid, and by this time or a few more years to come I'd be finding it commonplace to be a Mangaka's assistant or finding a job at a studio. I would've thrived, I thought. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Taking that walk down memory lane, and examining every so often the kind of person I am, I've come to believe that a lot, if not most of the person I am today was shaped by Anime. I wonder how then could I feel that kind of comfort when being in Japan, it was like returning to my own element, yet I know that it isn't home. And whilst being in sg, although I grew up here, the kind of understanding I hope for can never be achieved.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Oh yea, I remember the pains of growing up and going to school. Why have I started feeling now that I've been misplaced? When I was in the netball team in sec school, our team had reached the finals and as it was quite commonplace for classmates to say "Hey you guys are gonna win right?" I said "Yeaaaa! We'll win alright!" Next instant I was crying at the finals ground because my team mate who also was from the same class said it was non other than a sign of complacency and "You're not even playing anyway."&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Then again, I'm not saying Japan's my home either. How can you expect to be warmly welcomed in a place you didn't grow up in, and therefore cannot understand to the very depths? Yet I know I can't remain in a place which I do not understand or agree with in its concepts and way of life. I began viewing myself as striking similarities to Kino, from Kino's Travels, who would travel on her motorrad staying not more than a few days in each town she passed, witnessing the lives of different people yet not participating in them or passing judgment, just enough time to stay for a while and hop back on her motarrad to continue her neverending journey. Though I wonder if I could accurately see myself as a traveller since it's only been sg or Japan.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I remember telling a friend over ice cream last week, there is a kind of freedom from being in a place where nobody knows you. It might not make sense but, this freedom from detachment I think was what made me feel whilst I was in the car one day looking out the window and seeing this maid walking side by side a primary school kid while carrying her bag, that this image was strangely reminding me of the Entourages in Ergo Proxy! Whom their owners depend on for every single aspect of their lifestyles such that when the Entourages broke down or went insane, there was no chance of them returning to their once orderly lifestyles. And what has that got to do with freedom from detachment? It's because I know I wouldn't have been able to see things that way whilst I was still in sg; tell me who didn't grow up with a maid?! (I mean absolutely no offense to anyone) And then, even though I felt like I wasn't a part of where I was, I was still a part of it, in contrast of being able to detach myself somewhat now and watching the 'me' I was or the environment within the confines of myself and not a myself immersed in the environment.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I realise also that when watching shows, films, animes whatever now, I find somehow that I've become able to enjoy the process first, whilst almost leaving for granted the afterthoughts and significances that manage to come by quite naturally thereafter. I find the film connects and knowing why it connects, making it good (even though good is a subjective word).&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I wonder if I can call those days behind me. Instances where I watch a film and find I didn't like it when it was still playing because of elements I felt were "too unrealistic" and "dumb", or times of restlessness when things I define as symbols I pull out from the pictures overcloud any other vision. Or when I totally don't see anything, which I believe btw, is symptomous of looking at a scene and not even being able to make any sort of vague deduction of how it might be related to the whole picture, hence the eye sees each scene at face value and not registering in the brain. They do seem a bit rarer now.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Hmm, I think, maybe I've learnt to build things up, not tear them down, learning to see why things are good and how it should be praised, not the things that it isn't and therefore why it isn't good enough. Really, how I could even feel for a moment that there was something special in me which produced those pictures and could POSSIBLY eventually become something big, escapes me since I have a rather lousy impression of myself.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-2984205062902541340?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/2984205062902541340/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=2984205062902541340&amp;isPopup=true' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/2984205062902541340'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/2984205062902541340'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2008/03/slightly-more-than-3-weeks-ive-spent.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-7194758255776933385</id><published>2008-01-06T00:12:00.001+08:00</published><updated>2008-01-06T01:09:16.769+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;The fact that I have only 6,000yen left from my supposed 40,000yen self-declared monthly allowance just hit home today when I realised the scarcity of notes in my bankbook holder. I have stopped using a wallet and been shoving all my notes, receipts, notification of impunctuality (haha, from the train station when the trains are late. I need to collect them when I go to school), point cards and misc other &amp;amp;^*#$%^&lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt; in there. I suppose its time to get a proper wallet... hmmm... Burberry might be good... And there you go, the reason why I only have 6,000yen left now. That nasty spurt of over indulgence that started probably once the christmas mood kicked in is starting to be very inconvenient indeed. I know I really can't help the New Year sales and bill payments and gifts and souvenirs and seasonal necessities but I wished I could've pulled the reins on my expenditure a bit better. Yeesh.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;It might be the influence from the highly consumeristic nature of the Japanese society, everything they can possibly materialise into a sellable product they have gone ahead to do so and any possible gimmick they can pull out of the hat to make sales better they have executed, I have noticed especially recently, that my spending nature has become increasingly independent of any scarce rational thinking. Bye-bye to 7,000yen at the Jump Festa because I felt I couldn't walk away empty handed and making excuses that I should get souvenirs for other people. Not that I regretted spending on them, but the process of parting with my cash without proper consideration bugs me. 15,000yen on New Year sales shopping, I'd say it again, not that I didn't need the clothes I bought, I kinda like them, but then again you see, I only KINDA liked them and so bought them, not carefully considering the fact I am spending money that I receive by God's good grace.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;But I think just to sum the 2 weeks of frivolous spending up, I was granted the opportunity of going to the Ghibli Museum today, because a classmate had mistakenly bought tickets at an unfavourable time and thus generously gave them to a few of us. Before I left the night before, I kind of pondered for a while, what the museum might be like, in terms of importance of holding to their beliefs and inspirations. In other words, I was wondering whether it'd be a place they try to sell themselves to consumers who go to the museum expecting to see a good show, buy tonnes of goods of Totoro and leave without the slightest impression being etched in their hearts about what the studio strongly believes and holds to which translates into their work. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;I guess I was rather disappointed to see the hustle and bustle of the crowd, that wasn't very big, thank goodness the tickets separated entry according to time period that limited the numbers inside a little. The general behaviour of the crowd, in my opinion, somewhat lacked basic mannerisms say, not to push or block other people's paths. The big turnout at the Cat bus area meant only for kids with tonnes of parents just scrambling to get their children there. Yes I know Miyazaki meant to include kids when he had this museum in mind, but I just felt that the whole atmosphere was somewhat being (and what the Japanese would say Shouganai (cannot help it)) bastardised. I guess it felt like an idealistic notion in stark contrast to the obvious reality of things. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;I left with mixed feelings, probably. On one hand just hating the taste of consumerism in the air but still when one managed to ignore it for a while (rather and highly impossible amidst the crowd) and focus on the surprisingly simple yet pure and honest animations and drawings, one can't help but feel that the essence of Ghibli's good will towards their cause is contained within the very sheets of cels or film joined to run smoothly into a piece of animation that overall never lacks the ability to touch the heart of a person of any age.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;It really isn't easy living in Japan, I mean, living a life of integrity. I left with the feeling that to become an animator of such a studio, knowing full well what you're working for, what you want to accomplish and using all means to execute that piece of work in hope that those good intentions might reach through to the people on the other end, you've got to leave behind this materialistic world that skims only the surface for higher planes.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;P.S If you got confused at the first para, no, I did not buy a Burberry wallet. I can afford one but no, I didn't buy one and thank goodness at that!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-7194758255776933385?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/7194758255776933385/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=7194758255776933385&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7194758255776933385'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7194758255776933385'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2008/01/fact-that-i-have-only-6000yen-left-from_06.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-635669467022543604</id><published>2007-12-22T21:04:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-12-23T01:29:33.129+08:00</updated><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='FFXIII'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Jump festa 2008'/><category scheme='http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#' term='Dissidia'/><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;One of those rare visits again to the blog. Decided I'd like to type out my own comments on those trial game plays like what game magazine editors get to do all the time. Hehe. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I've been called an otaku one too many times by my friends already, it's not something I'm that proud of but well, where a situation calls for something to be done, it has to be done. Namely during a game convention, where it goes without saying to be on scene at least 1 hour before it actually begins.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;This time it was the Jump Festa 2007, wow, my first time attending! :D And my third time this year going to Makuhari Messe, a whopping 2 hour journey from my hostel. Since it was scheduled to open its doors to visitors at 9am, I had to take the first Rapid train on the Chuo line, which required me to set off at (yawn) 5.35am so just I could reach the halls by 8am.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;There were already tonnes of people just pouring from the station all heading towards the same destination, quite a number who were already frantic at 8am in the morning to beat the queue. When I got there, damn, I really can't describe how many people were already there. I was already starting to worry that I might miss the chance to get a ticket at the square booth to catch the exclusive video game footage in the Close Mega Theater, like what almost happened at the TGS 2007 if it wasn't for the generosity of a kind someone who offered me her ticket since she said she couldn't make the time.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I didn't run (but boy did I walk like lightning) to make the queue outside the hall but I couldn't help but give into the temptation to when I got in. I was determined not to let the chance for exclusive trial game playing and viewing yet un publicised video came clips slip me by this time. Not the third time no way. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Good thing was this was the Jump Festa. People come here for the anime, the game booths play a somewhat secondary role. Or so that's my theory, because when I got to the Square Enix booth, I could still see some space at the end of the marked out areas for queues. In fact I took a glance over at the Capcom booth and the DMC4 queue wasn't that long either. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Learnt my lesson from the TGS and went directly for the Closed Mega Theater, expecting them to be distributing tickets for the individual showing times, and they were. If you missed getting a ticket (because they give them out continuously until they're all gone) then you'd have absolutely no chance of getting in for the entire day. I got one for the 10am showing and it was about 9+am when I got my ticket. Turned a swift u-turn back to the Dissidia Final Fantasy queue after making a quick decision to try that out instead of KH 358/2 (Roxas and Axel's side of the story to KHII) since I own a PSP and not a DS. Despite the 60 min estimation on waiting time on the signboard, the queue moved fairly quickly and I was probably in the game playing area within about 30 min or so.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Dissidia's general gameplay system involves versus combat. For the trial session, you were made to choose one character out of 5 FF characters made playable including Squall and Zidane. The other chars come from the older FFs of which I'm not too familiar with. As expected of SE, the gameplay requires some technical skill and getting used to the controls. The terrain on which the chars fight on is 3D, with pillars on which your char can run vertically on provided you press the triangle button when the blinking arrows indicate the path you can choose to take other than on solid ground. There were also slopes and steps on which you could get your char to slide on either to get closer to the opponent or dodge a blow or something...? I don't know.. they got pretty annoying after a while because half the time I didn't know where I was sliding towards. In addition to the HP bar, there's a 3 digit number that I suppose has got something to do with your attack power. By successfully advancing towards the opponent and hitting the square button, your char can steal some of that power indicated by the change of the numbers. And when you manage to steal all of your opponent's power, that is, when the number hits 0, its indicated as 'Break' and your char's attack power will in turn increase significantly. Besides the usual attack and jump, pressing R + X + direction away from your opponent, this will allow you to dodge an oncoming attack. Your char does something like a backward somersault forwards and while airborne you can use the opportunity to launch an attack. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I didn't really get the hang of the system and controls and therefore wasn't able to fully utilise all the tricks available but if I remember correctly (or got the right idea of what was going on) there are some kind of power ups made available once in a while on the terrain which helps your char power up something like a power gauge which when full allows your char to enter some super mode to deal critical damage..... or something. I experienced some scenarios not explained on the manual which described the general controls and gameplay system, whereby after receiving damage and in the process airborned, you could press X to counter (?) can't remember exactly, but it was in response to receiving damage. And sometimes it was followed by either a prompt to press the square or circle to further attack, but I really can't say for certain.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Half the time being all confused trying to figure out where the opponent was while Squall climbed the pillars and the next half of the time trying to get to where the opponent was without getting hit, in the end, I managed to clear all the stages of the trial session which involved fighting all the playable chars. I certainly wouldn't have made it through if it was the normal difficulty cos I notice I was probably hit more times than I actually hit anyone. You could choose from two modes, can't remember the exact names but I bet it was something like simple cum easy mode and advanced cum normal mode or something. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;If Dissidia was just to be a one-to-one combat game I probably would give it second thoughts as to whether I should buy it, but the Close Mega Theater provided greater depth as to the overall flow of the game. There is story and there are definitely more characters, some that look like obvious baddies like Sephy and what looks like an Edea from FFVIII. Some memorable cutscenes included Squall going head on with Sephy, a breath of fresh air from the usual stagnant scenes of Cloud vs Sephy and a Tidus playing some kind of a supportive role to Kuja during some combat scene followed by the former running at some ultra super high speed dodging some flame balls being hurled by... I can't remember who. Its really nice to see them pay tribute to the old FF chars in comparison to the recent emphasis on the FFVII compilation. Enough of CLOUD AND SEPHY ALREADYY!! Let me relive those days of playing FFVIII in secondary school with the stoic and stubborn and thus annoying at times Squall and those days from Spira and Sin's toxin!! Yea to Dissidia! Woohoo!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;They also showed some clips from the 3 new KH games slated for release next year. KH coded for the handphone has a very basic fighting system it seems, from what I notice about the command bar - it only has the attack, magic and item commands. The clips offered some clues about gameplay including a High Speed Mode whereby you can zoom Sora around those pesky heartless and thus take them out more effortlessly. In addition to that, the Crash mode (? hope I got the name right) converts the current 3D battlescene into 2D (like rockman). The battlescenes seemed to involve destructible blocks which you can smash. No idea what the story for Coded's gonna be about but Sora was in the same clothes he wore in KH so it seemed pretty nostalgic, like we were going back to where everything started and tracing things back where they started.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;KH Birth by Sleep involves Roxas, in his Twilight Town image with some unknown black haired fellow who seems to be a really good friend of his. 'Cept for some baddy-looking bald evil yellowed eyed guy (is he Xehanort? GASP!) who seemed to be arguing with the black haired guy about the use of the keyblade, while the latter saying it should be used for friendship.. blah blah. Yes such idealistic notions, oh the beauty of friendship. What striked me about the fighting scene was that the command bars were actually chargeable gauges, not sure what for but they were undoubtedly charging. I couldn't read off the Japanese that quickly, worse still it was in Katakana, but I did remember seeing a 'Fire' command undergoing charging so that might be an integral part of the gameplay system. Ooh can't wait to find out what its all about. Wonder when they'll make birth by sleep trial playable. Good thing again its for the PSP so I am sooo definitely going to buy that when its out.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Haha okay, and in addition to the KH spinoffs there was this completely out of nowhere irrelevant out of place game called The 3rd Birthday, hahaha, its name in itself a laughable mystery, I find. They showed a girl dressed as a bride walking down the aisle of a completely empty church and when she gets to the front, a shadow of a man appears at the doorway. He whips out a machine gun and showers bullets all over the place and the bride takes out a handgun, swiftly turns round and fires some shots. A ring flies outta nowhere and falls to the ground followed by blood spreading all over the floor. Whose blood I don't know, and then the man is seen carrying what I suppose is a woman as he turns to walk out the door... Right.. okay. NEXT!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;The FFXIII cutscenes were more or less the same ones from the TGS closed theater, this time providing greater emphasis on the chars' expressions. Save for Agito, one can see the very distinct influence of foreign actors and films as depicted by the character designs. At the TGS, besides the very gloomy dark protagonist from Versus XIII they revealed a girl who based on the protagonist's reaction when he confronted her (by brandishing a sword, while she in turn morphed out some weapon) must have conflicting interests, and a joker looking Huckleberry Finn equivalent blond goofball touting a crazy looking shot barreled shotgun to boot. This time they further revealed a gang of other guys, about 2 or 3 more, who look like they're in cahoots with Mr Huckleberry. One of which looked very latino, and another one who looked like one of those smart brained baddies in Hollywood flicks, wearing spectacles and always the mastermind behind carefully planned attacks on the authorities. HAHAHA. The voices were muted but from their lip movement I don't think what they were speaking was English because it looked too strange coupled with such English speaking looking faces, I couldn't help but feel that Versus's different influences weren't very properly geled together, making it thus look a tad bit awkward. It's like they look like Caucasians but yet their movement looked a bit Japanese, or looked like what a Japanese thought a Caucasian from a Hollywood film would behave like. Now thats insightful. And also upon full body view, the chars look part Caucasian part gamish part Japanese and you could tell exactly which part of them looked like what. Like their proportions are definitely not realistic (long limbs and prominent but yet modest looking muscle - typically game char design), their clothes look like what a Japanese person would think looks cool, but they look Caucasian so.... you might be able to imagine, this could be the result of what a Japanese trying to play stylist for a Hollywood actor might turn out to be like. So funny yet confusing yet strange yet insightful. Oh they even threw in a scene that looked like the big leaders of the world in suits discussing recent spates of terrorist attacks round a table as in the movies. And there must always be a bearded guy!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay so enough of amusing myself with Versus XIII, FFXIII showed more scenes of this other girl who looks almost alike as the protagonist herself. I would say she bears some resemblance to VIII's Selphie, green eyes, cheerful disposition. Particularly notable was a closeup of the protagonist's face while she was confronted by some foot soldiers. Again what I would describe as a partly confusing mix between eastern and western influences. Her facial expression wasn't distinct and changed ever so slightly, shifting of the eyes, opening closing of the eyes, lip movement, and all to summarise one scene. The look from her eyes gives her a rather sleepy eyed dazed look, a somewhat lazy expression but mixed with determination at the last spurt of facial muscle movement where her eyes narrowed and she pursed her lips. But I'm quite sure I saw some what I describe as very darty movement of the eyes. I think its probably impossible for anyone to really tell what she was thinking or what kind of emotion she had while giving such a fzcial expression.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Other impressions from the Jump Festa... not much to say the least really. Having slept a meagre 1+ hour or so I was already suffering from the zombie withdrawal symptoms at about 1pm. In fact when I woke up that morning I was thinking What?! Already??! I contemplated trial playing DMC 4 again since I quite screwed the first time up with the controls and wasting valuable game playing time, and they were giving out some crystal strap again. But nah, too much queueing makes Jack a dull boy (does such an expression even exist?! HAHA). They had started extending ticket distribution te Dissidia and KH 358/2 somewhere in the late morning whilst I was wandering around the halls so by the time I decided I wanted to attack the queue for KH the gameplay tickets had already been completely distributed so no KH for me this time round. Another lesson to be learnt. No space for breathers in between, just do everything you came for first and relax later on. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Not one to leave more than an hour before closing time, I decided what the heck, lets just play FFIV on the DS even though its already out and I haven't that much of an interest, just so I could get the clear file they were giving out to those who trial played the game. For KH, they gave out a handphone strap and for Dissidia, a UMD holder with the game's logo on it. For those who entered the Close and Open theaters, they gave out a clear file with the FF 20th Anniversary logo as well as a pack of Christmas and new year themed postcards, really really cool with an assortment of game designs. You get random designs so you can't get all of 'em by just getting one pack. Since I was there alone, I really couldn't be bothered to go attack the queues for the same event again so I decided to heck it.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Despite part of me wanting to go home and sleep, the other part just thought it was ridiculous to come all the way to Makuhari and go back at 1+pm so the most obvious thing to do other than trial game playing was to purchase character goods. It's really incredible, this Jump Festa. They've got all the big merchandise companies down with their limited edition or early launch special anime merchandise of all the popular Jump anime. Naruto, One Piece, Prince of Tennis, Reborn, Bleach and others I can't keep track of. So you could be walking over to the Bandai booth and see a whole assortment of all the Jump character merchandise and then you walk down the Animate booth and you see a whole different assortment of the same characters. If that wasn't enough, there was a limited entry area for purchase of limited edition Jump Festa limited merchandise which you had to go all the way outside to queue for again. Queueing, I tell you its part of being Japanese. It's in their blood. They have a Queue gene that imprints the idea that queueing is part and parcel of daily life in their minds.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I think part of me was screaming out to be filled by retail therapy. It's like a little voice that echos out at the bottom of your heart that goes " I don't care what but just BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY! And MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE! WAHAHAHAHAHA! Don't you stop". But there wasn't really anything I thought was worth buying. Anime merchandise has come to the point that its just so predictable, they always produce the same ol things over and over again, same kind of average designs on characters. I just bought the ones I found rather amusing, like a Gintama file with a classroom scene in the usual chaos of character interaction. I bought a Naruto versus Sasuke themed wall clock (like wth right, wallclock) with a background of some mystical legendary animals like two gods waging war against each other. And then just to kill more time after buying the limited Jump goods that involved queueing both outside and inside again, I decided to hop into the SE goods queue since I saw a Cactuar plushie and I thought what the heck lets go queue again and get that for the brother. As a result of that spurt of unfounded urge to spend, besides the stuff above, I ended up with a black and white Naruto vs Sasuke themed Noren (piece of cloth hung over doorways in Japanese homes) and a small souvenir pack of custard cakes that says on the packaging, I was at the Jump Festa 2007! &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;What I thought was interesting too was a 2000yen priced One Piece themed Pirate Bento with rather satisfying-looking contents with what looked like a chicken leg which you had to hold up in one hand to bite off from, and skull shaped rice.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;All my trips to Makuhari always end up exhausting and two out of the three times I've been there I had to go alone which is rather... sad but oh well, you know what they say. A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. And I got to play Dissidia and enter the Close Mega Theater and be entertained more than I bargained for.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Guess that sums things up as 'a good day' :)&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-635669467022543604?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/635669467022543604/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=635669467022543604&amp;isPopup=true' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/635669467022543604'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/635669467022543604'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/12/one-of-those-rare-visits-again-to-blog.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-3455709142965481708</id><published>2007-10-26T21:39:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-10-26T22:02:22.399+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;I just watched a music video clip of cutscenes from &lt;/span&gt;&lt;a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=Go168VsHzf8"&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;FFVIII on youtube &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;and am rather surprise to realise that I actually like FFVIII more than VII, even given the advanced graphics and unsurpassing texture quality and realisticism, VIII, for that moment seemed a lot more likeable than what VII is what it is now. I find Squall's and Rinoa's facial expressions a lot more expressive. Despair and sorrow just pierce through your heart when Squall called out to what seemed like an illusion of the back profile of Rinoa, when he slumped down in fatigue and hopelessness on a dry cracked ground wishing he could see her and watched a white feather descend from the sky. Relief when Rinoa watched Squall in her arms come to seemed like liberation from a thousand woes. You can't help but move along with them in their emotions. I don't know if its correct to say this but, maybe the camera angles and sequence of shots or selection of scenes just made me think VIII was just artistically beautiful. It was just a beautiful quiet story told of its characters and how they reacted in the ever changing series of events and twist in plot. There seemed to be minimal distractions from flashy scenes with cool gadgets and mecha or fantastic stunts. Just space for the appreciation of character development and interaction.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Even a video clip of X, which I happened to chance upon again on youtube made me think the old FFs all had some kind of nostagical something that the current projects lack.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-3455709142965481708?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/3455709142965481708/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=3455709142965481708&amp;isPopup=true' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3455709142965481708'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3455709142965481708'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/10/i-just-watched-music-video-clip-of.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-1607561186926496748</id><published>2007-10-21T23:27:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-10-22T00:15:49.113+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Another one of those long awaited (if any of you have even bothered keeping track by now) blog entries I'm writing now.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;The weather has gotten considerably cold to the point no sane person would leave their doors and sliding windows open. It's been about 17degs thereabout average temperature and it's time to take those trenchies out of the closet.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I went for one of those things you gotta go for as a foreign student today. What they call an international student exchange la dee dah fancy name event where we got to have some kind Japanese people dress us up in kimonos and parade around for an hour or so, whilst at the same time popping in to check out what Japanese tea ceremonies, playing the shamisen (and that stringed instrument its name just escapes me) are like.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;I'm quite a fan of the shamisen, thanks to anime, which does so well publicising its own country's history. The oh so cool olden day blind Japanese person who would nomad around playing his shamisen whilst telling a story with it, which historians say was one of the ways historical events were retold and thus passed down the eras. I won't forget the blind shamisen player in Samurai Champloo who almost got Jin and Mugen there with some very high skilled sword wielding.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Anyway, I did get the chance to play a bit of it, and it's pretty fun too. Just three strings brings down the complexity level quite some, I think. Apparently, depending on which finger you press down on the strings produces a different note when the string is strummed. Oh and did you know the highest quality, most expensive shamisens are those made out of cat skin? :(&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Onward to rather sticky matters, all of us in school were made to write speeches for the Bunka sai (school festival cum open day) of which each class sends a representative to participate in the speech contest. And whoop de doo *twirls finger*, mine, rather irritatingly, about what might happen if a Singaporean made friends with a Japanese, was picked on by those terrible classmates and now I am stuck with a speech I haven't memorised yet. Pah. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;The turn of the weather marks the occurence of a long awaited event, if which I could, usher it personally into dawning on myself. Realisation over self-criticism was the gift from God today. Realising and somehow somewhat therefore becoming more open to the idea of humility, which thus leads also to view people and the world around me less harshly, receive them with greater patience, tolerance and sympathy. And to a less burdened soul. Instead now I view 'them' with appreciation and part admiration as well, more than the shifty glances I used to give and strange bizarreness I thought was 'their' thinking and behaviour. It led to realising that maybe I should learn to appreciate the way of thinking that seeks to preserve one's self-interest, in the sense of respecting what's best for one's well-being and preservation of one's passion. Perhaps its time to leave seeking to create a soothing physical environment made of peers we can have fun and joy hanging out and talking with in the back seat and start putting in a bit more considerable effort into looking after myself.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-1607561186926496748?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/1607561186926496748/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=1607561186926496748&amp;isPopup=true' title='3 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/1607561186926496748'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/1607561186926496748'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/10/another-one-of-those-long-awaited-if.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>3</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-7895159588938154891</id><published>2007-08-06T14:45:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-08-06T15:10:40.045+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Hahaha. Okay I'm so sorry for leaving you guys in the dark for sooo long. I think it's been about 3 months since I last blogged. I think there were too many things going on and all sorts of emotional rollercoaster rides I was going through as well that I couldn't really find a time when I was a bit more calm to write things down in a consistent manner.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, my summer break started on the 28th of July, so for the entire month of August there's no BLOODY school! Woooooot. I don't know, lessons were starting to get boring as we moved up the ladder, currently studing advance Japanese and it's all about studying about the environment and reading newspaper articles, doing summaries, all that boring stuff so even though I'd absolutely nothing planned for the hols I was still happy that they were coming.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;For the past week of summer vacation.. what have I been doing, hmm, let's seee. First of all, melting day by day because there isn't a fan in my room and the really hot summer season has officially kicked in! Just one or two weeks before there were some heavy rains because of the rainy season but now its really hot and dry. I would run down to the meeting room at least for an hour a day just to enjoy the air con cos I'm just too stingy to turn on the one in my room.. I don't want my electricity bill to soar this summer man. But now, Wahaha, I bought an electric fan!!! So happy with it. I went to this huge store called Don Quixote which has many outlets all around selling absolutely everything from branded goods to electrical goods to toiletries. You name it, they have it. And at cheap - reasonable prices to boot. In fact I was enticed by a few other electrical goods they had like a takoyaki cum sukiyaki teppan (hot plate) set which was.. cha-chang! Only 1,900yen! That's hella cheap :D&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Hehehe. Okay anyway, what else.. I've had a lot more time nowadays to look up anime movies and stuff related to games. Guess what, a new model of PSP is coming out on the 20th of September and I am so going to buy that, muhaha. I felt so lucky and blessed that I hadn't gone out to buy one before that because the new model is going to be slimmer, lighter and has a range of new colours to choose from which look a lot better than the current ones. I am also, I must say, VERY tempted to buy a Nintendo DS as well cos absolutely everyone has one!!! Must! Have! My! Own! DS!!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Besides games, I've discovered quite a lot of anime movies that I will definitely want to watch, at least 3! Each one coming out from this month to October. And also, the not-to-be-missed annual TOKYO GAMES SHOW 2007! Which showcases hella lot of games and animes and other stuff like works by animation schools; the school that I'm going to next year is going to showcase some of their works so I would really like to check that out. Oh so exciting isn't it.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Then, the Japanese language school I'm attending now arranged for all the people in the school who are going to the same college next year to go for the open campus together. So we're going on the 17th of August. The open campuses in Japan sound really hands on (at least for the specialised training colleges) whereby you participate in actually implemented class programs and lessons, like in my case, design a character and some other stuff like that. It's all very tailored to the specific course and we are all going to take the full day course (there's morning and afternoon courses for those who decide they want see what other courses offer). And the school provides lunch as well! How convenient. Anyway, I'm quite excited to see what the campus ground looks like cos it looks ultra big and really scenic in the website. It's got a swimming pool, tennis courts, football fields (because they have sports courses). And I see their advertisements everywhere! On the train, on tv, in the karaoke lounge, wah lao.. Haha. They must be really rich.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And as for now, I think I am going to try to find a part time job for this summer because there are just too many things I would like to buy. Like all the donuts from Mister Donuts and all the flavours from Baskin Robbins 31, the PSP, the DS and all the games... haha. But if I don't manage to get one.. then :( too bad I guess, I will live as a poor starving student this summer. Haha. Heard there are a coupla Singaporean restaurants around here so I'm thinking of calling them soon and asking if they need part timers. My speaking in Japanese is really subpar, I have this habit of chewing on my words, haha, if you can picture what its like.. so I hope everything goes well *crosses fingers*. Alright, hope this update suffices. Am going to make a phone call to the restaurant now.. Eeeep! Ciao Cara! (Bye darling in italian, as taught to me by my italian friend :) hehe)&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-7895159588938154891?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/7895159588938154891/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=7895159588938154891&amp;isPopup=true' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7895159588938154891'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7895159588938154891'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/08/hahaha.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-7345210924422107347</id><published>2007-04-22T00:59:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-04-22T01:00:59.939+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;It's been quite a while since I last blogged. Many things have happened that have kept me on my toes and sleeping late at night only to wake up at 6.30 the next morning so yes I am actually just having enough rest to tide me through the days' events.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The weather has been acting up. It was really warm the Saturday before during the cherry blossoms viewing cum picnic event that the SSAJ (singapore students association in japan) organised at a really huge park at GyoenMae (Shinjuku). The park is just gargantuan in size, at one point of time we lost one of our friends and not having any handphones yet we were prepared to throw in the bucket and leave her to her own means of entertaining herself. But amazingly, somehow she managed to find us in the end. Weird. Okay anyway, it was a nice surprise to see all the cherry blossom trees in full bloom since the start of the blooming period was much earlier this year and we weren't expecting to see such healthy clusters of flowers. The sun was shining very strongly, you could even feel HOT and we had to take off our jackets. Hard to believe especially when just the same morning at Sagamiohno it was still rather chilly, but still not all that bad. The temperature was rather bearable then.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And like a display of its tantrums, it started raining abruptly the next two or three days, the temperature, of course, dropping to some very cold temperatures, the kind that leaves you scurrying from place to place as quickly as possible. The tricky part about this weather, was that in the morning when we set off on our bikes to the train station it was cold and windy but it was always clear and bright, but after classes ended till when we got back to the train station, it would always be raining. It took me a few days to get used to riding a bike through narrow pavements sandwiched by the kerb and building or some other obstacle, sometimes another cyclist coming from the opposite side which is definitely scary since you don't want to crash into the other person but at the same time, the both of you would be barely touching each other. I think the Japanese are really a kind of get-up-and-go type of people. Whatever happens, life goes on. They just take the matter in stride and get on with their lives. As such, you see some pretty amazing feats of life, such as, Japanese people riding bikes whilst carrying umbrellas. How they do that so well is very much a mystery to me. Thinking that I might just simply need some practice at it, I proceeded to try doing so... ... with much unglam.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Firstly, with only one hand on the bike, that would mean braking becomes more inefficient. Turning corners requires ultra slow speed in order for you not to roll off your bike and onto the street. And okay that might not have been so bad... until you realise that there are other road users besides yourself, such as cars for example, that absolutely insist on driving through those narrow alleys, other cyclists or pedestrians where the path becomes very narrow, or even without such external factors a seemingly innocent lamp post or one of those short poles sticking out of the ground would be bound to leave you frantically steering to avoid hitting them at best. Of course the worse instant would be if you fall down. Anyway, I had my umbrella flying off to where it pleased on my first try, then I decided to be a man and take the rain as it was, later on deciding it wasn't very pleasant to ride even in a drizzle. So the next day, I had another go at it, practice makes perfect doesn't it?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Even on streets without obstacles, my one hand bike riding has wobbling tendencies, at which if I'm not paying attention, I might even find myself on the road the next second with a painful behind. I think the ultimatum comes near the end of the journey back to the hostel, where past the traffic lights of the main road and entering the maze of houses, we confront this thing of a mini hill where you have to peddle hard and quickly to ride up it, followed by the slope down thereafter which makes the bike go very fast downward. It was quite dark already, and somehow I had managed to ride up quite haphazardly, but still managing to ride up the mini hill with just one hand to properly steer and the other trying to decide between shading my head from the rain or holding onto the other handle. So I suppose this other guy decided it was a good idea to pop out riding in the opposite direction and without his light on so that we sense this looming shadow. Haphazard bike riding takes up as much space as it wants, cares not for other things around and goes wherever it wants, so there I was wobbling up the hill, wobbling toward the other cyclist, I tell you you can't insist on going another way when your bike decides to go the way it wants to. So it seemed to want to make friends with this other bike, hobbling ever steadily toward it, taking me, the innocent spectator along with its fancies. But just at the last moment, when it decided it had had enough of saying hello and when the other cyclist sensed the inherent danger of crashing into each other and thus became wobbly himself, my bike just narrowly scraped through, neither of us touching each other. But I bet that must've been a rather strange way of saying hi to someone you don't even know, as though I thought it was a good idea to cycle INTO people.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, the weather forecast has been rather accurate. I checked it on my phone (haha yes I have gotten my paws on one!) and it said the weather would get slightly warmer and why yes, it did today, much to my delight. The handphone I got was from Softbank, that offered an attractive sounding plan which allowed you to call or sms other Softbank users for free. I had a friend who convinced me that everybody was changing to Softbank and now that I use Softbank, he became the only person I knew who used Softbank.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This phone is rather amazing in itself, imo. I was enticed by the built-in TV, which apparently is absolutely free for you to watch. No subscriptions whatsoever to watch TV on your phone. The screen flip-flips nicely horizontally and the picture is clear. The programs you watch even come with subtitles (in Japanese of course) specially for phone users. You don't even get to see subtitles on your TV sets. This is useful if you haven't got your earphones on and you're watching TV on the train where silent mode is necessary, or if you're like me, learning Japanese and can't catch everything you hear. The only dumb thing that is pissing me off now is that outside Tokyo, I can't seem to receive any tv signals so that would mean outside Tokyo, which is at home, I can't even watch tv on my phone, which isn't supposed to be the case. Still, you can check the tv programs for the day on your phone which gives me the opportunity of running down at such and such a time to catch a program in the common room.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;People here don't key in friends' details on their phones, they beam their details over through infrared or if more convenient, bluetooth though I haven't really tried out how that works. But yes, this infrared is very convenient indeed, especially since here in Japan they don't call it sms but email, where to send messages you have to specify a handphone email address to send your message to. In your details page, fill in all the important information like address, email add for phone and web, handphone number, landline number, you can even add a picture of yourself. And watch all this information transfer with a snap of your fingers to your friend's phone.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This phone also allows extra storage capacity in the form of a micro SD card to a maximum of 2GB, which you insert into it. The phone itself comes with about 17MB free memory. Expect to store in hoards of music, videos or episodes which you can watch as and when you like and when the tv doesn't work. Or simply fill them with tonnes of pictures you take using the phone which has a 2.0 megapixel camera, not to mention the kind of options it comes with such as altering exposure and turning on a light if it's too dark.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I thought today I had better prepare for when I receive the micro SD card in the mail which my mom will send to me because the price of one here is absolutely ridiculous (at least 5,000yen for a 1GB card, at least 8,000yen for a 2GB card), and buy the proper usb cable to connect my phone to my laptop for data transfer when I realise when I got home, that although my laptop isn't rigged with bluetooth (what some of the other people use for convenient data transfer without physically connecting their phones to their coms), it comes with an infrared port which meant I didn't need to buy a 1,000+ yen cable.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The silly thing again is that somehow, the phone only accepts .3GP, .MP4 and .M4A file formats for music. And I thought mp3 was so universal, why in the world these weird formats. Which left me no choice but to search online for some freeware that allows format conversion of music files. I learnt that .M4A is a type of music file for Apple users, termed a type of 'lossless' format which supposedly means no loss of sound quality. Anyway, just a technical issue, I test trialed some songs and they finally reached my phone safely through the infrared and into my music folder, if which not, I would still not be able to listen to them even though they're in. Oh my and the sound quality is just unbelievable. Such clarity. Ladies and Gentlemen, you need not carry your boom boxes around anymore. This phone packs all the punch despite its size. Like an mp3 player (well mp4 more accurately speaking), it has all the stuff it needs, like options to create playlists and tinkle with sound effects (Bass/surround/karoake/rock/hall/hiphop...). Other impressive but not so important functions at this point of time include, tv recording and voice recording. The phone comes with this very thick handbook that supposedly tells you what you can do with your phone. And with some rather complicated illustrations of the phone being connected to a power outlet and either your PC or discman, I suppose it even allows you to record music playing on another portable audio player. Wow. That's all a little bit too much, but I think it will be rather fun exploring all the different things I can do with my phone. Anyway, ohmygoodness the excitement!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Okay besides the sakura viewing picnic, the Singapore Embassy held a reception at its HQ located in Roppongi, the hip and happening place with all the clubs and designer boutiques (I saw the stores for Louis Vuitton and Yohji Yamamoto's collection for adidas, Y-3) and we got to eat lunch for free! And a very good lunch at that too. CHICKEN RICE!!! IN JAPAN! Oh my goodness, I couldn't have asked for more. Roti prata and those chinese noodles that you eat in restaurants. And we got to see a lot more other students as well as talk briefly to the embassy people even though we really had nothing to do with them. But the ambience was very nice, the place was furnished very nicely even the garden and pond outside exuded a calm Zen-ish sort of atmosphere. And somehow it was nice just talking to the other students especially hearing from those who live in obscure areas about how different things were. It was just nice to hear about various experiences each person had. Coping with the cold, sickness, living far from schools, mugging for entrance exams (not us, the undergraduate students), inefficient heating systems (haha! Hot air rises and the heaters are at the ceilings). Also located in Roppongi was my senpai's school, Hollywood Beauty School or something like that that looked like a very seriously cool shopping centre with glass walls. Roppongi just gives one a kind of relaxed, laid back, where-the-rich-dwell kind of feeling. Maybe because it was a Saturday.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Then I've been hanging out with the Africans from my hostel. They really just crack me up. No actually one was from Uganda, one from Benin and the other from Brazil and ohmygoodness they are more auntie than me in the supermarket talking between themselves about meat and taking quite some time to decide what exactly they wanted to buy!! I found myself just laughing out loud at everything the Ugandan said (he has a name and his name is Ronald) because he is in all seriousness putting forth and opinion which just sounds quite preposterous, you can't help but laugh very loudly.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Alright this is a very long post indeed, since its a sunday tomorrow I can afford to sleep late for once this week so there, I hope that was entertaining enough and I didn't put you to sleep halfway.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-7345210924422107347?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/7345210924422107347/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=7345210924422107347&amp;isPopup=true' title='6 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7345210924422107347'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/7345210924422107347'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/04/its-been-quite-while-since-i-last_22.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>6</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-5563630631454135998</id><published>2007-04-09T15:27:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-04-09T15:54:35.271+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Haha. Okay it seems everybody likes to look at photos (and photos only) so here's more of them to keep you guys entertained. I realised I don't take many photos outside, of buildings and such, maybe because my camera's XD card keeps acting up or I don't want to look like a stupid tourist. Bah. Anyway, here's what I've been cooking and eating the past few days. Thanks to Judy who introduced me to Japanese curry. Haha.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/thriftmall.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;See the red tape-ish thing across the glass? That's the 'Thrift Mall' area. It spans a few shops selling those vintagey quirky knick knacks, clothes, shoes. I bet imported from England and other countries like that. Very flea market-ish feel. It's one floor down from the 100 yen shop so we took a look around, some of the stuff aren't that expensive.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/firsthomecookedmeal.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;My first home cooked dinner. You guessed it, instant noodles from the 100 yen shop (3 for 100 yen! What a steal. Hahaha). Ham. vegetables and mushroom I got from this cheapo supermarket that the seniors recommended us to go to (called 'Taiga'). They keep playing the same cheesy jingle instore that goes "Suki Suki! Onaka Suki suki!" blah blah blah and then it goes "Char Siew Tonkatsu Hambagu!". Yes its catchy after a while but moments later and thereafter it gets very annoying especially when you're a poor starving student trying to do mental sums on which product on the shelf is cheaper. &lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/dinner.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/whatsthat.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Yesterday's dinner of leftover pasta and... ... what's this??&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/misosoup.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/dinnernexttotwomoons.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;A steaming pot of miso soup! With mushrooms and chicken meat! And dinner is served, next to 'Two Moons', the red Indian on the postcard. I bought it at a shop called Titicaca that looks strangely touristy because of the prints and batik-ish stuff they sell there.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/kitchensink.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;What the kitchen area looks like now. It's rather small and cramped especially after I've stocked up on cooking utensils. There's only one fire so meals tend to get cold easily if your meal consists of two parts you need to cook separately.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/lunchandmilk.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/closeupoflunch.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;My lunch today :) I bought the Japanese curry in a packet which I poured over my dish of fried onions, chicken, carrot, potato and mushroom, all heated up of course. And what better way to wash it all down than with a cuppa milk. Not quite ready to cook rice myself so I had bread instead.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-5563630631454135998?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/5563630631454135998/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=5563630631454135998&amp;isPopup=true' title='5 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/5563630631454135998'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/5563630631454135998'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/04/haha.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>5</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-5631746380114112015</id><published>2007-04-07T21:04:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-04-07T21:56:06.706+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Some pictures I took so far:&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/myroominagist.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/washingmachine.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;This is my room! Or more like apartment. It's got everything including a washing machine, toilet, kitchen area, fridge and even a balcony where you can hang your laundry to dry. Here's what it looks like from the door.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/toilet.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/stoveandfridge.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;The toilet is quite cramped, I hit my knee on the sink the other day. And there's the stove and fridge. It gets a bit squeezy in the fridge after I did grocery shopping but maybe its cos I didn't dare put my food on the areas that haven't been cleaned. It's so dirty inside but I decided to spare you guys the gross pics I took of the inside.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/bedandtable.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/viewfromthebackoftheroom.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;And this is the bedroom. The desk is quite tiny but other than that, there's tonnes of storage space! The second pic is the view from the back of the room. If you draw the curtains, there's a sliding glass door which you can unlock to access the balcony.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/frogbin.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/bedding.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Froggie bin! It was left behind by the previous owner. So many different spreads and sheets and I don't know thingamajigs, there were 4 of them. So I called a senior in to help me.. Help! Help!!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/walkingout.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/Sagamiohnohostel.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;That's us walking out from the hostel. Sensei is the man wearing a blazer in the front. He takes care of our needs in the hostel and he's really useful to have around when an applicance malfunctions, for eg, when my washing machine hanged on me. The second pic is the view of the hostel from the front. The entrance is rather small.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/cutecar.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/moji.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;That blue car never seems to leave that spot, so I kind of use it to make sure I'm going in the right direction. There's another very similar looking blue car parked at a house that also always seems to be there and that's where we turn left to the main road so it serves as a very important road sign indeed... Oh there's Moji, my bus partner on the way to the municipal office. We had our alien registration and health insurance cards done there. She's from Mongolia.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/sakura.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/moresakura.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Cherry blossom trees! They were everywhere and I saw many on the bus trip. Sometimes you see only one or two amidst other green trees but other times like this, you'd see a lot of them together.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/outsidethemunicipaloffice.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/waitingforthebus.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;My lecturer for the Japanese film module used to say that when you see cherry blossoms just a few flowers at a time, they don't look pretty. But when you put a whole lot of trees together, they look really nice. So enjoy!... The overdose of sakura.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/totheleft.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/scatteredpetals.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Mmm yes. More! More! More! There were lots of petals scattered on the ground.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/examiningaposter.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/examiningaposter2.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;We were at the post office opening our postal bank accounts. That's either Yan or Tong looking at a poster. I can't tell them apart!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/suspiciouscat.jpg" /&gt; &lt;img src="http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d103/Mikhailovina/thirstycat.jpg" /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;Suspicious looking cat that was right in the middle of a big empty playground. It was actually just crouching there, looking left and right. By the time I took out the camera it decided it was thirsty.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-5631746380114112015?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/5631746380114112015/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=5631746380114112015&amp;isPopup=true' title='5 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/5631746380114112015'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/5631746380114112015'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/04/some-pictures-i-took-so-far-this-is-my.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>5</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14081440.post-3070257055704401466</id><published>2007-04-05T17:17:00.000+08:00</published><updated>2007-04-07T22:06:09.442+08:00</updated><title type='text'></title><content type='html'>&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:arial;font-size:180%;"&gt;Notice for those who complained &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:arial;font-size:180%;"&gt;about small font&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/u&gt; &lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;Please change the font of your browser &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;(Largest/Larger/Medium/Smaller/Smallest) &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;under "View"&gt;Text size&gt; Larger or Largest in &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;your browser. No more complaints about &lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;em&gt;small font alright?!&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-family:georgia;font-size:85%;"&gt;Okay brace yourselves for a fairly retarded post. As I type, I`m using the com in the common meeting room and people will start arriving and their presence seems to obviously hint that they want me to get off the com so they can use it...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, I`ve started unpacking in my room. Those who have not heard yet, my room is actually like a one room apartment, fully self sufficient. One step in and you see the washing machine and stove and sink to your right, toilet to your left. One more step in and you see the refrigerator. Many more steps in and you`re in the bedroom. The entire place is rigged with so many cupboards and drawers so theres actually tonnes of storage space. I was completely appalled the day I moved in, firstly at the floor because it was so dusty, then at the kitchen stove for all the dirt. And lastly I was most appalled at the fridge, it was SOOO dirty, I wish you could see it but you can`t cos I`ve not uploaded the pictures I`ve taken so far because this annoying computer doesn`t allow you to plug in devices like a thumbdrive in which I transferred the photos into.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The seniors recommended buying most of our stuff from the 100yen stores. There`re 3 altogether around our district. The nearest and smallest which is actually a 99yen shop which is probably great for buying the usual stuff, `cept there isn`t much variety to choose from, say two brands and that`s about it. The next one is at the train station, which is about 20 minutes walk from the hostel. That`s pretty far if you`re gonna lug home a few big bags of shopping. The shop is called DAISO, yea guess it`s the same one we have in Singapore, `cept its cheappppppeeeeerrr here, cos 100yen is about 1.30SGD. They do stock items priced more than 100yen too though. The last one is just opposite the station. This one`s the best in my opinion cos its so big, it spans 2 floors. The things are arranged in proper categories and there`s quite a range to choose from. Bought my pot and pan from there. Notice I didn`t say pots and pans cos yknow, I`m not that rich to buy so many things at once.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;There are some really cool vintage shops one floor down the 100yen shop. They have that vintage feel, you know, psychadelic colored clothes, old-ish stuff that look inspired from decades before. Some of the clothes are reasonably priced as well and there was a lot of nice stuff. I saw a bag that looked very much like that ASOS bag I wanted to buy, it`s like the Jimmy Choo one, and it costs about 4,500yen, which is about SGD52, and I really wanted it, but no way was I getting it cos I`m not here on holiday. But if its still there next month I might get it if I have enough money:) I felt there and then that I would love to take Fang around cos I think she would really like the place, think she`d go mad over the quaint shops and snazzy buys. There was a shoe shop near the station that stocked mass manufactured shoes like those plain white maryjanes for going to school and a few other variations that I thought looked pretty nice. Woulda definitely been a haven for peeps in Singapore who like customising shoes like that.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Right, as of now, 2 days after I`ve moved in and cleaned up (`cept the floor), it feels a lot more homey. It just lacks proper internet access before I start to see my room as MY room. As I have mentioned before, it is rather retarded to use the common computer because people could hop in anytime and use the com for quite long, or its really just impossible to use the com in peace for like an hour or so. The teacher in charge subsribes for the internet, which is the same line as the one in the meeting room. We could tap into this line with his permission and pay a one time payment fee of 2,000yen to use the net for as long as we stay here, definitely a much cheaper alternative than subscribing for a personal line ourselves, for which we`ll have to pay 12,000yen initial payment (spread over a period of 1 year or so) and 2,800yen per month at a flat rate. Of course, I`m hoping the rest of the students don`t have laptops or aren`t MMORPG fanatics who will sap up phenomenal amounts of bandwidth and leave the rest of us waiting for our browsers to load. A senior has recommended that a few of us students living on the same floor subscribe for a personal line and share the internet among the few of us, but that seems a little more troublesome so I think I`ll just take the easy way out first, get the teacher to buy a cable to hook my laptop up and I`ll see how things go.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;A list has just been put up for bicycles on sale and the teacher has asked us to write our name down on which bike we`re interested in buying. They are all second hand and cost either 4,500yen or 5,000yen. Three of them were left behind from students before and are therefore free. Sure a bike comes in handy I guess. Japan has a kind of bike riding culture. You see people cycling on the streets all the time. I think I`m quite fine without a bike. Afterall, I`ve lugged my grocery shopping and 100yen shopping for a good 20 minutes walk (if you exclude the time walking from shop to shop) and you gotta pay a fee for parking at the station. Parking your bike outside a shop to buy stuff is fine I guess, but you risk having your bike taken even though cases like that are really rare (senior says "It`s really weird if your stuff gets stolen.. it`s just really weird because nobody steals around here.") and having to learn how to ride properly without banging into people or a wall or lamp post or car because houses and such are packed so closely to each other and those bike riding Japanese are so capable of weaving in and around people, I wonder how they do it. Btw, one thing I`ve noticed is how the motorists here have the peace of mind to drive so blooody close to pedestrians. It`s annoying though. They drive through alleys where people are walking on both sides. My friend was crossing a zebra crossing and one driver just turned into the road just barely missing her. I`m curious to find out the accident rate around here.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Visited a store today selling second hand manga, games and soundtracks today. As in other stores, there was so much stuff and you have to really read and look at the signs on each shelf or dangling from the ceiling to know whats where and whats going on. Even though the things are organised properly, it is rather tiring for the eyes to discern whats of interest because there are just too many details. Anyway, most manga sell for 105yen (about $1.30SGD) and are unwrapped. Though I`ve seen very new-looking manga before, these definitely do not look new but are of readable condition. It`s the kind where you buy a book for dirt cheap and don`t bother really taking good care of it. Some PS2 games were selling for dirt cheap especially the older ones like about SGD30 per game. I`m not sure whether they were selling new PS3 sets but the price they quoted was somethinkg like 57,500yen, which is slightly cheaper than the release price of 59,800yen quoted by Sony. I do hope I can get one in the near future...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyways, I`m feeling hungry now. It`s 9.18pm here and I`ve yet to eat dinner yet. Intending to cook pasta with the pasta and gravy from the 100yen shop and the onions, ham and mushrooms and other stuff I got from the supermarket. Other people are also waiting to use the computer so I`m going now. Do hope the teacher buys the cable soon.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Cheers!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/14081440-3070257055704401466?l=conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com'/&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/feeds/3070257055704401466/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=14081440&amp;postID=3070257055704401466&amp;isPopup=true' title='4 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3070257055704401466'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/14081440/posts/default/3070257055704401466'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://conquer-your-fear.blogspot.com/2007/04/okay-brace-yourselves-for-fairly.html' title=''/><author><name>Chua</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/05616003630193685490</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:extendedProperty xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' name='OpenSocialUserId' value='06596756716167049690'/></author><thr:total xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'>4</thr:total></entry></feed>