My stomach constantly troubles me. I hope the medicine I got from the docs yesterday is going to work better than everything I've tried so far and that it works at the concentration it is at now. Depending on how my body responds I might have to be given a higher dosage or worse, have to depend on it for... ever.... until it decides to stop. Horrors.

Anyway, speaking of horrors, stupid Resistance! As soon as I started getting the hang of the game and controls and drawing wrong conclusions that it was a pushover, I get slammed with neverending missions (thought that was gonna be the end... NO?!??) and TRAP after trap! You get to the point where you start uttering swear words as a kind of reflex, not really in rage but.. those buggers! Just when you thought that was the end they start pouring out in numbers and kinds and combinations putting your judgment of which gun to use and whether to find cover or go frontal to the test. I find myself having to hit the restart mission option time and time again. When is it going to end??

Anyway, been experiencing yet another slump since the family came and after starting seriously applying for A-1 Pictures probably due to not watching anime for a while. I still really wonder what drawing really means to me and what its really about. What does it mean to live a life by drawing? And if God has chosen this path for me how should I live it? It dawns on me yet again that I'm treading in unknown territory and where everything isn't as familiar as I think it is.

I kind of wonder what it means to be happy... but then again, I really shouldn't be thinking too much (or at all..).