My first attempt at applying the Kosé Sekisho Whitening Mask:

It's a black, gooey, viscous liquid that oozes forth with great enthusiasm when I peeled off the seal. Although I'd read the instructions thoroughly before squeezing out the liquid I still managed to drip it on my tee-shirt. There goes another one. Anyway, after some painstaking effort to even it out over my face (it insisted on sticking more onto my fingers) it started to solidify like it should. I probably only gained full light of the fact that it was solidifying when I realised after a while I couldn't laugh or eat the pieces of watermelon I had in a bowl. With my mouth only able to open slightly ajar, I resorted to forcefully prod the fruit in with the help of a toothpick. I also realised that I could not, period, jester my mom or brother or dance while making funny noises in front of them like how I would have liked to. Finally, 30 minutes passed and it was time to peel the mask off. Slowly, slowly, it gets a bit pricky at the cheeks and chin but wooh, it feels good to peel it off in one whole piece and to get it off my face. On close examination, if you're lucky, you'd see the little white-ish blackheads stuck on the mask. I also noticed that my pores look less dirt-clogged and seem to have reduced in size. Yay. Now go to Kosé OG and pay 34 dollars for a tube of the Kosé Sekisho White (or should I say black) Mask and have fun yourself!

With my driving test coming up in one week's time and with the seemingly not so competant instructor I have (I'm taking private, that should explain everything) who makes me stop at the roadside so just he can jump out and buy his breakfast, lunch or kopi and who talks on his handphone frequently while I'm on the road having just enough time to scream at me when I'm in any sort of trouble and who calls me a slow and blur person, and with myself having driving lessons two times a week up from once a week, and considering how much my mom is paying for lessons and how much time I have to sacrifice for the usual ol' go straight turn right turn left u-turn crap, I am almost at my wit's end. Actually, I've already crossed the end. It's annoying having to go through all the crap above, but it's just infuriating to hear your own mom agree with the instructor and talk about you in earshot over the phone saying the same things he calls you when you're driving. I can't help but scream everytime something like this happens. More likely directed at the mother, since she is the one who falls ill for such unwholesome behaviour. I don't think you'd like to hear your own daughter on the phone associating adjectives like VERY slow, VERY dumb, VERY outdated, not knowing what is going on most of the time, does not even know how to use the remote control, VERY gossipy over the phone, talks very loudly regardless of all life around her, not to mention slow on my allowance all the time, with people such as yourself so it's not very much to ask for you to be a little more considerate about other people's feelings especially when they're from the same family does it? It's probably because of growing up in such an environment that I'm someone who is acute to the things that are going on around me, including the possible implications of actions and who might become affected by them, in positive and negative ways. I would outrightly say I hate people who have no manners, who are rude, insensitive and ignorant, and who do or say things out of their own interest without first acknowledging the opinions or feelings of those around him/ her. It is really this kind of action that pushes me over the limits, and drives me to burst out in rage because I absolutely cannot contain such behaviour. It is so unbecoming. And because of that, I constantly have to suffer the drawback of such outbursts - the guilt that comes afterward. Sometimes I wonder whether it is a kind of cunning mechanism to get people like us to stay quiet under verbal slander.

Every little step I take, every little piece of the world I see serves to constantly remind myself of the one thing that is important to me (besides God :) ). And that is that I cannot trust anyone to show me or teach me what animation means to me other than the one obvious choice I have left, and that is to go to Japan. My hopes have been betrayed, Singapore is definitely not the place to gain any useful skill or knowledge. The heart and passion and the giving that comes with such passion is so obviously missing that it sort of pains me to see how horrible they are at it. It is one thing to be not so good at it and quite another to hurt a person through such methods of "teaching". It is quite demoralising, but to stay strong, I need to control my thoughts. This is not animation.